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Unread 07-04-2008, 10:29 AM
Jim Hayes Jim Hayes is offline
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Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: Kilkenny, Kilkenny, Ireland
Posts: 4,949
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My First Crit.

For six whole days it was incubating--
the poem for which the world's been waiting.
Nobody will guess it is my first--
come on, have at it, do your worst!

A hit! At last-- it’s been a day--
a little applause won’t go astray.
What’s this? My meter’s a little off?
Well, far be it from me to scoff,

but a thin-eared bitch of a moderator
has the nerve to say my meters grate her?
Hey! a jennet saying it isn’t rhymed--
it’s a homophone! Is the asshole blind?

And, look at this-- am I to please
some yob in the fucking Antipodes?
An anally retentive myopic gobshite
is actually suggesting I do a rewrite!

And this crit here! Well, they have a quota
of ignorant wankers in North Dakota.
And what about this “Kerb it, quick!
It's jealousy! From a useless prick!


Alright, alright, when I’ve retuned it,
I’ll be back
--The Poetic Wounded




[This message has been edited by Jim Hayes (edited July 04, 2008).]
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