I Have Mail
In Nairobi, a woman with six months to live,
is making her peace with her god and decrees
that ten million dollars is mine if I give
her five grand up front for solicitor’s fees.
Opportunity calls to me, Mrs Abacha
says; “Dearest one” Ooh, a sweet little pitch-
“Please send a reply making sure to attach a
bank account number--next week you’ll be rich”.
An accountant in Kenya begs for my trust--
he has over paid contracts and want to redeem
the surplus resulting and ask that I just
deposit the cash to partake in the scheme.
My email address has won a huge prize,
(send one thousand dollars to process the claim)
and here comes a message that some fellow dies
with a secret account that he held in my name!
A couple more weeks and I’ll pile in the dough,
I’ve a new Russian lover and, strictly between us,
these tablets, I’m told, guarantee I will go
for twenty-four hours with a much bigger penis.
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