I have been very grateful for Rhina's commentary and for the additional comments, particularly Sam Gwynn's alerting me to the existence of another painting also titled "Vanity" by the same painter. I will have to include the earlier date in the subheading to avoid confusion. I am reluctant to discard "stiffened" for several reasons, though I appreciate that the line scans more easily with "made stiff." Unlike Carol, I hear a secondary stress on "sleeves," so I think the line does still have five beats. I chose the word "stiffened" partly because it sounded most natural to me, partly because I liked the effect of the reversed foot reinforcing the meaning, and partly because I intended it to carry sexual overtones, tying it to "below her waist" and "in what coin the piper must be paid." I mean to suggest a connection between female beauty, male desire, and money, in which the jewels and rich fabrics have less to do with aesthetics than with market value--a kind of sign saying "for sale--expensive." Physical beauty is always appealing, but I am put off by the idea of women exploiting it to sell themselves (in marriage or any other way). So the foolishness of vanity, in the painting, is that I assume the woman in the picture either doesn't know or doesn't care where her primping will lead. Most people haven't commented on this aspect of the poem; I am assuming it is because they haven't noticed it, though perhaps they have thought it too obvious to deserve comment. I like my poems to operate at multiple levels, and this level is buried the deepest, I think.
Susan
|