Rhina,
I agree that the connection between 'letting go' and the surrender implicit in the notion of 'falling in love' isn't clearly made. There is also I feel overuse of abstractions in st 2.
(Coincidentally, one of my recent ideas-for-poems that typically take ages to incubate plays on elaborations of the phrase 'letting HERSELF go'. This is/was colloquially applied to older women with negative import, but it can be amusing to ask 'Gog where?' and dream up agreeable fantasy destinations. Sorry for the deviation!)
Dear Anon,
Would suggest reworking st 2 with the aim of substituting something more specific for the 'love'in l 4 and possibly repeating 'let' for emphasis in the last or penultimate line. E.G. 'let yourself love and let the world unfold'. But I'm sure you'll come up with something far better!
Best wishes,
Margaret.
PS Many apologies for misattributing this piece to Carol (purely because her name - as poster - was on the sidebar). This was an unforgiveable lapse as I'd read her introductory spiel and fully support her proposal that poets (when known) should NOT be identified!!
M.
[This message has been edited by Margaret Moore (edited November 26, 2004).]
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