Dear Lee:
Thank you. Each of the haiku I posted, with the exception of the first, play with the conventions of haiku (too long, excessively minimal, no specific seasonal word, etc.). I was curious to see how far one could go towards stretching or bending the conventions before they can no longer be considered haiku--or, if you prefer, haiku-like.
The moonset piece is actually the ending of a free-verse poem I wrote years ago. But thank you for the suggestion on turning it into a haiku--I have no problem making the necessary cuts/edits in order to do so.
What I would be interested in is a discussion of form. In your suggestion for the moonset poem, you have truncated the last line (in terms of the 5-7-5 syllable pattern that is drilled into our American minds as schoolchildren). How much variation in that is 'allowable'? For instance, the leaves originally went:
rain-weight:
a leaf uncups
drops
Secondly, how much haiku do you see that doesn't specifically refer to nature or seasons which you find successful? Or would this all be considered heretical? I would be curious to know.
Thank you again.
nyctom
[This message has been edited by nyctom (edited May 03, 2004).]
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