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Unread 05-15-2020, 01:05 PM
Brian Allgar Brian Allgar is offline
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Location: Paris, France
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It wouldn't do to leave the subject without a tribute to the much-maligned Dr Spooner and his apocryphal sayings. Here are some of the things he never said, with translations for those unfamiliar with the good doctor.
  • "A toast to our queer old dean!" ("dear old queen")
  • "Is it kisstomary to cuss the bride?" ("customary to kiss")
  • "The Lord is a shoving leopard." ("loving shepherd")
  • "We have suffered a blushing crow." ("crushing blow")
  • "A well-boiled icicle" ("well-oiled bicycle")
  • “They were sitting in a nosey little cook (“cosy little nook”)
  • “They searched every crook and nanny (“nook and cranny”)
  • "Is the bean dizzy?" ("Dean busy")
  • "Please sew me to another sheet." ("Please show me to another seat.")
  • "You have hissed all my mystery lectures; you have tasted two whole worms; you were caught fighting a liar in the quadrangle; and you must leave Oxford by the next town drain." ("You have missed all my history lectures; you have wasted two whole terms; you were caught lighting a fire in the quadrangle; and you must leave Oxford by the next down train.”)
Low song and cake tear, Allen.

Last edited by Brian Allgar; 05-15-2020 at 01:08 PM.
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