[Roger Slater]

Julie, I think Fliss isn't asking for a critique of the poems, but a reaction to how well they flow into one another. Too bad we don't have a forum for people not asking for detailed critiques but posing specific questions. But since there is no such forum, and D&A is the only place outside Metrical where you can post your own work, here we are.

But I don't really understand the question. The order of poems in a MS is often quite difficult to settle on because the individual poems are independent of one another, but these poems apparently tell one story and are naturally arranged in a linear, chronological fashion. So what's the problem? Poem #1 starts on day one of the new job, Poem #2 on day four. Perfectly straightforward. I can't imagine a different order, unless you have poems for day two and day three that would go in the gap.

[F.F. Teague]

Yes, it's all about the flow.

I was just wondering whether it's okay to go from Day 1 to Day 4. Perhaps it is. The next poem I've written is the one about tennis, but I'm tempted to come out of the office briefly and bring in the home life at the time. I lived with three other women in their 20s and I had a best friend; they were all involved in what happened. My mother was also significant, hence the nod in poem 1. But perhaps I should email Jayne before I continue, to make sure she doesn't have any objections to the thread.

Best wishes,
Fliss

[F.F. Teague]

Hi,

Another quick visit, to say Jayne's explained why this thread isn't appropriate for D&A and I've said fine to delete it. Happy to continue via email with John and others

Best wishes,
Fliss

[Jayne Osborn]

I'll just close the thread, rather than delete it, so that no one will wonder where it went!
Fliss is happy to receive PMs if you'd like to make any more comments.

While I'm here, and just to clarify: D & A is specifically for contests and fun exercises in which any of us can participate. (It's not a board for posting poems daily, though, especially given our "one poem per week" rule on the other boards.)

Jayne