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07-26-2010, 12:32 PM
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Member
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Devon England
Posts: 1,708
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John, your Grecian urn summary in Post 27 reminded me of an even shorter one from an old NS comp, author again unknown. From memory:
Lovers on jug
Never can hug.
Men rot,
Pots not.
Wouldn't swear to the punctuation.
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07-26-2010, 01:55 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Dayton, Ohio
Posts: 1,035
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********************
Last edited by Don Jones; 10-18-2010 at 06:00 PM.
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07-26-2010, 04:36 PM
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Member
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 12,945
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tpp spells too
Moosebrugger (isn't it?)
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07-26-2010, 05:12 PM
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Member
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Dayton, Ohio
Posts: 1,035
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**********************
Last edited by Don Jones; 10-18-2010 at 05:59 PM.
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07-28-2010, 09:25 AM
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Member
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Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: New York
Posts: 16,491
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Here's one from my children's archives, given a new title. I hope Brits know "tush":
HOWARD'S END
(E.M. Forster)
It makes me groan to sit on stone.
Unless there is a cushion
plumped up there upon the chair
I will not put my tush in.
I'm on my guard when seats are hard.
I don't mean to sound whiney,
but I can't bear the sort of chair
that hurts my tender hiney.
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08-03-2010, 11:06 AM
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Member
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: UK
Posts: 828
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This is my attempt, using the title of Martin Amis's latest novel (which I haven't read). Will Lucy find it amusing? Goodness knows.
The Pregnant Widow
She says: “That photo's my late husband, looking
Nice, which he was ̶ he shared the chores and cooking,
He didn't smell, he made a decent wage.
And so, since I was at the broody age,
I married him. Well, I got pregnant soon,
At which he started burbling like a loon,
All about nappies, breast pumps, cot design.
Did he not realise, my child is mine?
All day he'd quote great chunks of everything
From Spock to Gina Ford and Truby King,
Which was annoying, quite beyond endurance...
And since I knew he'd adequate insurance,
It's not surprising I began to wish...
The upshot was, I cooked a special dish
And watched him wolf the whole lot down, poor chump.”
She smiles a little smile; she strokes her bump.
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08-03-2010, 12:47 PM
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Member
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 12,945
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Oh, she'll lke that, George. She must. I've done FOUR of the bloody things and none of them as good as that.
I know tush.
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08-03-2010, 12:54 PM
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Distinguished Guest
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Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Belmont, Massachusetts USA
Posts: 2,976
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There was a dolphin, shiny blue,
whose fin was of a darker hue.
An oddity among his kin,
they called him Huckleberry Finn.
sorry...
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08-03-2010, 02:19 PM
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Member
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Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: New York
Posts: 16,491
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Marion, cease and desist
or I will call my lawyer
to sivilize you -- that means "sue"--
Sincerely yours, Tom Sawyer
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08-04-2010, 10:02 AM
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Distinguished Guest
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Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Belmont, Massachusetts USA
Posts: 2,976
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Bob,
Touché! Can't think of any riposte, witty or otherwise...
But here's my revenge: 
In Search of Lost Time
People, Entertainment, Us,
Sports Illustrated, Cosmo -- I'm
wanting something serious
to read. But, damn! I can't find Time!
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