[John Whitworth]

Sphereans did well as Pilgrims. Bill Greenwell and Marion Shore just missed out and Frank Osen, Martin Parker and George Simmers were in the money. THe Great Bazza didn't win for a change but he made it into poetic immortality via Martin Parker's effort. Well done all of you.

The new competition looks a winner for us.

No. 2660: Body language
You are invited to submit a poem in praise of a bodily part that has been overlooked and under-celebrated by poets (16 lines maximum). Entries should be submitted by email, where possible, to lucy@spectator.co.uk by midday on 11 August.

[RCL]

Deleted and submitted.

[Julie Steiner]

Stern Measures

As muscles go, it’s highly underrated
.....by bards, who tend to praise the heart instead.
Though overlooked and under-celebrated,
.....the sternocleidomastoid turns my head.

The aliens in sci-fi movies lack it,
.....if villains. (If they’re good, they’re not so flawed.)
Although the heart more often claims the plaque, it
.....(the sternocleidomastoid) gets my nod.

Thumbs down to you, pollicis brevis (flexor).
.....Eat your heart out, myocardium.
I have to choose--if not, I'd make my neck sore!--
.....the sternocleidomastoid as my chum.

[Roger Slater]

THE GLORIOUS GLABELLA

He had just one eyebrow,
not two, the poor fella,
and struggled through life
without a glabella.

Some praise the eyebrows,
but I praise the space
that sits in between them:
the jewel of the face.

A nose doesn't need
such a scraggly umbrella.
Bring on the barber!
Bring back his glabella.

[John Whitworth]

Cripes! And I just thought I'd try something on the elbow. I shall have to find out WHAT these things are. Julie, that's neat and clever. I'd put a small each-way bet on you.

Elbows though...

Elbows

On one elbow well reclined,
Ancient Romans wined and dined,
And lifting elbows frequently
Restores conviviality.
Out at elbows? Do not shirk
The remedy of honest work:
To be swans among the geese
Requires a mite of elbow-grease,
And you'll better your position
Elbowing the competition.
If Sphairistike you'd win some,
Play the plangent violin some,
Ere your ageing elbows stiffen
Rub in unguent oils. And if an
Intellectual you would pass as,
Know your elbows from your arses.

[FOsen]

Spleen

From hand-to-hand, we’re gland-on-gland; to pick a favorite’s mean,
and so I’ve tapped an organ apt: the splendid little spleen.

We love our hearts, we prize our minds; admit it though, they’ve been
the host to what I praise the most: a healthy dose of spleen.

Some say the Nodes of Ranvier are pleasant and serene;
It sounds too boring, I’ll take the roaring from the venting of the spleen.

Others hew to orbs of blue or hazel, brown, or green,
though sometimes, all may view the world through eyes imbued with spleen.

Oh, you may like your uvula and find its tone pristine,
but any word’s more plainly heard, when jellied well with spleen.

I've seen cirrhotic livers in a glossy magazine,
but neither booze nor ire can bruise or mire the doughty spleen.

Stiff upper lips once kept our grips through life's chaotic scenes,
but now abuse is our excuse to exercise our spleens.

And, asked to chart their favorite part, some people wax obscene—
you can @#*! those @#*!ing @#*!ers, if you’ve got the @#*!ing spleen!

Frank

[editing in to thank John once again and add 2 stanzas]

[John Whitworth]

Lovely, Frank. Do you think the last line would go better if you dropped the opening 'But'?

[Ann Drysdale]

Psst! Julie - this is the only forum where it's OK to point out unbritishnesses of diction and since this is a UK comp. and I've got money on you, do you mind if I say that, here, the pronounciation of flawed won't rhyme with nod? But if you said "the sternobleedinwotsit I applaud" it would be a go.

Wotcherfink, John?

[John Whitworth]

You said a good thing, O Drysdale of the Mountains!

[Roger Slater]

LOBE AT FIRST SIGHT

Although it dangles from the ear,
  it plays no role in hearing,
and what it does just isn't clear,
  except to hold an earring,

to hang out just above the spot
  where jawbone touches throat,
but as it does, to never do
  a single thing of note.

Yet that is why the earlobe is
 my favorite body part:
because the only job it does
 is be a work of art.