You raise an interesting point, James, and I appreciate it.
So, Jake, often when I don't much like a poem, I just skip it. Or write a line or two, noting small bits I enjoy or suggesting local emendations. Your poem had been sitting in that pile, for me, for some time, and this time around, I decided to verbalize my thoughts there, partly in hope of doing it once to make a more global personal statement. I hope you don't mind; you'll note that my long opening comment is anchored in a line by line analysis of what I liked and didn't like here as I read.
I should perhaps add, James, that as ex cathedra pronouncements of what is and what isn't good poetry - or anything else for that matter - tend immediately to get my back up, so I try not to make them myself. That is perhaps why I try to speak in the first person, and in the singular not in the plural. Nobody died and made me Emperor of Taste. This I think partly addresses your concerns. Though as I say, I can only speak for myself.
Last edited by John Isbell; 07-20-2019 at 02:04 AM.
Reason: last sentence added