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  #31  
Unread 04-08-2001, 01:48 AM
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John Beaton John Beaton is offline
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Sir Prance-a-lot

Do not go gentle into that, Good Knight,
There is no bulb inside to light your way;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light!

There is another outhouse here to ease your plight,
But there are other structures in your way -
Do not go gentle into that, Good Knight.

Your armour’s hard to take off ‘cos it’s tight.
This would have been much easier by day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light!

Now you’re uncanned, you are a sorry sight.
A photo booth! You can’t be seen this way!
Do not go gentle into that, Good Knight.

The flash has flashed and your skin’s pallid white
Is now recorded – you must run away.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light!

I know you’ve not had time to expedite
Your mission. There’s no outhouse anyway !
Do not go mental. And with that, good night!
(Rage, rage again - we're dying with delight!)

Porridginal
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  #32  
Unread 04-08-2001, 04:22 AM
Carol Taylor Carol Taylor is offline
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What great entries! Jan, and Howard, hope we see more of you. And Porridge, welcome back, you've been missed!

Carol
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  #33  
Unread 04-09-2001, 10:29 PM
C.G. Macdonald C.G. Macdonald is offline
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I enjoy the humor and hijinks of these--especially the knight and the outhouse, and the hijacking of "the darling buds of May." Afraid my contribution is not light verse at all, but was sparked by this funercise (sp?), so I'll try it out here.

Every Night They Have a Fight


My mother, your father, live across the street--
an eyesore, even in this budding slum--
fourteen thirteen Alligator Street.

Step-children step or jump to a different beat,
a herky-jerk of one-off syncopation.
My mother, your father live across the street

behind a picket fence like yellowed teeth,
askance in a wide jaw, ready to lunge--
fourteen thirteen alligator street,

a home of sorts, where kids conspire to meet
for hours without home cooking, chores, attention...
My mother, your father live across the street

but plod back from long shifts, dead on their feet,
"Don't get on my last nerve. I'm warning, son."
Friday thirteenth on Alligator Street

goes 24/7. But for a treat
there's smokes, liquor, drugs, a loaded gun.
My son, your daughter live across the street--
fourteen thirteen Alligator Street.


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  #34  
Unread 04-12-2001, 08:23 PM
Georgia Bowers Georgia Bowers is offline
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(Serious and slight efforts welcome...) -- villanelle
Hi. I'm new to this forum, and since I enjoy villanelles and the ones I'd read in this thread, I thought this would be a fun way to get started.

Do Not Chase Wildly after That Cute Guy
(thanks to Dylan Thomas)

Do not chase wildly after that cute guy;
Young girls should shine in charm school and home ec;
Wait, wait for their true love to pass them by.

Good girls who read proposals in the sky
And letters filled with rhymed, romantic dreck
Do not chase wildly after that cute guy.

Wild girls who dare to look boys in the eye,
While casually choosing partners based on spec,
Wait, wait for their true love to pass them by.

Gay boys who look at boys and then deny
Their differences and hold their thoughts in check
Do not chase wildly after that cute guy.

Shy girls who date bold boys who always try
To give them rings to wear around their neck
Wait, wait for their true love to pass them by.

And you, my daughter, to whom no rules apply,
Though tempted to hook up; say what the heck;
Do not chase wildly after that cute guy.
Wait, wait for your true love to pass you by.


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  #35  
Unread 04-14-2001, 08:57 AM
Jan D. Hodge Jan D. Hodge is offline
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Nicely turned, Georgia. I especially like what I take to be the rather wise irony of the final stanza. (How else can one advise one's daughter?)

And may I, a newcomer myself here, welcome you to the forum.

Jan
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  #36  
Unread 04-15-2001, 12:08 AM
Georgia Bowers Georgia Bowers is offline
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Thank you, Jan, for reading, commenting, and welcoming me to the forum.
And welcome to you, too.

Georgia
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  #37  
Unread 04-17-2001, 03:52 AM
A. E. Stallings A. E. Stallings is offline
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Hello Eratics,

Sorry to be a bit scarce lately. Easter festivities are a big deal in these parts (much bigger than Xmas), and we've had houseguests, etc.

More fun entries! Welcome, Georgia. A wryly-wrought parody!

Porridge,

I shall treasure "Do not go mental"...

CGM

Enjoyed. I must confess to some ignorance as to the allusion, though, of the repetends...

Thanks to so many of you for taking up the challenge! I've really enjoyed these!
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  #38  
Unread 04-18-2001, 07:26 PM
HeatherFaye HeatherFaye is offline
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Please Be Gentle For This Is My First Post

Please be gentle for this is my first post.
Sweat I have sweated and tears I have shed,
Praise, Praise is all that I ask of my host.

Though wise men and women all, you may boast,
I came to feed my ego, not my head.
Please be gentle for this is my first post.

Outrageous fortune, I’ve suffered the most.
My words fork no lightning it has been said.
Praise, Praise is all that I ask of my host.

My work in flammable liquid should roast,
They said my words clunked and bounced like dropped lead.
Please be gentle for this is my first post.

And don’t try to teach me, just let me coast.
Towards more knowledge I will not be led,
Praise, praise is all that I ask of my host.

And don’t try to tell me that you know the most,
I have no interest in light you may shed.
Please be gentle for this is my first post,
Praise, praise is all that I ask of my host.

It surely needn't be said that I am a novice, and this is exactly the kind of work I need to be doing. I really had fun, and at risk of overstating the obvious, it was a lot harder than I thought it would be.

Thanks.

Heather
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  #39  
Unread 04-28-2001, 12:46 PM
C.G. Macdonald C.G. Macdonald is offline
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OK, I give up. I was hoping someone other than the author would recognize my repeated couplet, and smuggly supply the pertinent 411, but I guess it was somewhat obscure. I thought it would be almost universally known. It is from a jump-rope rhyme that was all the rage during my formative years on the wrong side of the tracks (Vallejo, CA):
My mother, your father live across the street,
Fourteen, thirteen Alligator Street.
Every night they have a fight,
And this is what they say,
"Boys are rotten,
Made of dirty cotten,
Girls are dandy,
Made of sugar candy..."
I wish I could supply the moving conclusion, but it is in neither my memory, nor my Anna Banana Book of Jump Rope Rhymes.

As to the praise vs. criticism discussion that appears and reappears on these boards, sure, I enjoy praise, just as I enjoy Ice-cream Sundaes. But I don't want a diet of either. Criticism is MUCH more useful, in sparking revisions that can improve poems immeasurably. Isn't that what it's all about?

Asking for it,

CGM


[This message has been edited by C.G. Macdonald (edited April 28, 2001).]
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  #40  
Unread 05-05-2001, 12:00 PM
ChrisW ChrisW is offline
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Lots of good stuff on this thread! My own contribution seems unworthy in comparison, but now that I've done it, what else am I going to do with it than put it up here?
The repetends are from Pope's Essay on Criticism (slightly altered to suit my convenience), where he is recommending the example of the Ancients (lines 165-6).
Though I started out having fun twisting Pope's lines, I'm afraid I didn't end up with a humorous verse. In fact, it may have come out sounding a little overwrought. Oh well, I hope it will be intelligible, and if it is that no one will think it autobiographical (it isn't).

"Straight-acting"

Let it be seldom and compelled by need
(When business calls you to another city)
And have at least some precedent to plead—

The Greeks perhaps—or, better, blame the weed
You’ll smoke tonight—oh hell! blame Aphrodite.
Let it be seldom that, compelled by need,

You join the dance you’ve always parodied:
Yoke your pleasure to the plow of duty—
You’ll have at least some precedent to plead.

Your lips pay tribute to the common creed,
Deny the summons of your deity.
Let it be seldom that, compelled by need,

You hear his urgent tune played on a reed—
And when your body heeds that lawless ditty
You’ll have at least some precedent to plead

If body capers unaccompanied
While you look on, detached as some committee.
Let it be seldom and compelled by need—
You’ll have at least some precedent to plead.




[This message has been edited by ChrisW (edited May 05, 2001).]
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