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  #11  
Old 10-21-2018, 06:12 PM
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Gail White Gail White is offline
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Roger, I loved "The Thing About"! So, since you asked (didn't you?), here's an oldie from me.

SUPERFLUOUS WORDS

The world does not need one more villanelle,
yet teachers still assign the exercise.
Sooner or later someone does it well.

More verses than the damned can read in hell
are written daily, so it's no surprise
the world does not need one more villanelle,

but does it need the countless things we sell
in stores, the million things we advertise?
Sooner or later something is done well.

The lovers meet, the monk prays in his cell,
the married have their kids whose scratchy cries
the world does not need. One more villanelle

or less, what does it matter? Truth to tell,
we all make things for others to despise.
Sooner or later someone does it well.

What if we fail in trying to excel?
We'll all fit coffins of a standard size.
The world does not need one more villanelle,
but still, from time to time, one does it well.
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  #12  
Old 10-22-2018, 10:00 AM
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Douglas G. Brown Douglas G. Brown is offline
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Default A good old - fashioned fourth of july

"Let's make this a safe and sane Independence Day. Remember, alcohol and fireworksdon't mix." - Radio public service announcement

They'll get themselves into a wicked fix
To have a buzz on, lighting fireworks;
Since alcohol and fireworks don't mix.

From inner city dudes, to backwoods hicks;
With pyrotechnics, danger always lurks.
They'll get themselves into a wicked fix

With ethanol inspired dumbass tricks,
And cherry bombs set off by drunken jerks;
Since alcohol and fireworks don't mix.

A liquor addled brain distinctly clicks
Into a self destructive mode that works
To get its owner in a wicked fix.

And like these guys, their booze besotted chicks
Transform to maniacs from quiet clerks,
Since alcohol and fireworks don't mix.

Hung over as they cross the River Styx,
Are souls of boozers killed by firworks
Who got them into a fatal fix,
Since alcohol and fireworks don't mix.
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  #13  
Old 10-22-2018, 11:09 AM
Roger Slater Roger Slater is offline
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Good stuff!

David, I'm glad I inspired you. I like it! And thanks, Gail. It's funny we both write self-hating villanelles. You've inspired me to write another:



HONEST VILLANELLE II

Before I'm done, you'll sicken of this line.
Three more times you'll hear it, sad to say.
You'll want to stick it where the sun don't shine,

then go and have yourself a glass of wine
and hope, when you get back, I've gone away.
Before I'm done, you'll sicken of this line.

You'll call it stupid, dull, or asinine,
and if you keep on reading, come what may,
you'll want to stick it where the sun don't shine.

The weird part is, I've done it by design.
Villanelles have rules they must obey.
Before I'm done, you'll sicken of this line

and yet the blame, I promise, is not mine.
It's in the rules. It's in the game we play.
You'll want to stick it where the sun don't shine,

and you won't want to be my Valentine
inside this poet's nightmare Groundhog Day.
And now I'm done. You've sickened of this line.
Go on and stick it where the sun don't shine.

Last edited by Roger Slater; 10-22-2018 at 12:01 PM.
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  #14  
Old 10-22-2018, 08:42 PM
Chris O'Carroll Chris O'Carroll is offline
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How do people manage the whole 19 lines?


Villanelle-ish

To cut a villanelle a few lines short
Would be a literary felony
No poet in his right mind could support.

The world would greet with a derisive snort
Any such bobtailed pseudo-poetry.
Don’t cut your villanelles a few lines short.

To start a villanelle, then to abort
The mission, leaving off a line or three,
Is something no sane poet could support.

Just two rhymes, 19 lines – this form might thwart
Some versifiers’ ingenuity,
But that is no excuse to cut it short.

Lines 1 and 3 as they recur can sport
Small changes to avoid monotony,
But no bard who’s not bonkers could support

A change like this that cuts the whole poem short.
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  #15  
Old 10-27-2018, 09:12 PM
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Gail White Gail White is offline
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I wish the Sphere had "Like" buttons, like Facebook. I would have pushed it for Roger's and Chris's entries above.
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  #16  
Old 10-27-2018, 09:45 PM
Ned Balbo Ned Balbo is offline
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I loved them all! Thanks for sharing, Gail, Doug, Roger, Chris.

Gail, sooner or later...you're absolutely right! Otherwise, we would all stop writing. :-)
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  #17  
Old 10-30-2018, 09:19 AM
Eric Mwathi Eric Mwathi is offline
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Oh my gosh, it’s villanelle blood-feasts of this order that make me proud to be a spherian. Just when You think RCL could not impress you more with his parodies his, in every way, intoxicating villanelle outdoes his previous work inspiring similarly controversial discourses of it in the form in Edmund Conti’s approval and celebration of the form turning a bit sour in his next one, Roger Slater’s affectionate cynicism in not one, but three villanelles ( rivaled by Gail White’s equally cynical “The world does not need one more villanelle“) , sentimental humour and later social commentary in Douglas G. Brown’s, deep contemplation on the form’s structural nature by David Rosenthal. Great stuff!

Last edited by Eric Mwathi; 10-30-2018 at 10:01 AM.
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