Eratosphere Forums - Metrical Poetry, Free Verse, Fiction, Art, Critique, Discussions Able Muse - a review of poetry, prose and art

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Old Today, 03:31 PM
John Isbell John Isbell is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: TX
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Hi Matt, Jan, Fliss, David,

And thank you very much for these visits! Now i feel I have something to go on with revision, and to get some poetry across here to a reader.
Matt: I plan to adopt just about all of your suggestions. I like prose, but agree that "but" is better. The priest and monastery were in the Algerian War, that's tighter. Glad you came around somewhat to my line break (update: though I just killed it). I'm deleting the Julian the Apostate Nazarene line. And I like that you like the messengers with the coins.
Jan: I'm glad you are enjoying this. Yes, the coins were likely obols, at least to me.
Fliss: amaranth was a food staple in Mesoamerica. But I like that it is immortal in Greek mythology, and to Milton for instance. It is a charged sight on the hillside, like the laurel. No deities though.
David: I'm glad you like the Seferis poem. My God, how full of joy!
I think the ending works better Matt's way.

Thanks all, thank you,
John

Update: revision posted.

Last edited by John Isbell; Today at 03:35 PM.
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