[Allen Tice]

The original item has been edited out so it can be submitted for publication.

Sorry, all gone.
Thanks, Maryann.

- Allen Tice

[Martin Elster]

Cape Hunting Dogs

Conspicuously mottled they are,
So they’re easily seen from afar.
***The Cape hunting dogs
***Hang out by the bogs.
They’re black, brown, and white—how bizarre!

Their spotting makes quite a hodgepodge
Of colors resembling collage.
***Each dog is unique,
***They look awfully chic—
Quite conspicuous—no camouflage!

An artist like Vincent van Gogh
Could have made a great painting, you know,
***Of a large pack of fifty,
***Their patterns so nifty,
The sun almost sets them aglow!

Maybe a painter like Pollock
Could have captured these dogs when they frolic,
***Which, when done all their life,
***Keeps them free of much strife
In a land that is fairly bucolic.

If you watch them, you’ll readily see
That family life is the key
***To getting along,
***For they know they belong
To the pack which, on grasslands, roams free.

The den that they make’s recreated
From burrows extant but vacated
***By some other life form
***And now is kept warm
By the Cape hunting dogs who have mated.

They give birth to a very large litter,
And then feed and take care of each critter.
***I refer to the young
***Who are cleaned with the tongue
Of their mother or her puppy-sitter.

The puppies get lots of attention
From adults in the pack, not to mention
***Being fed every day
***With the meat from the prey
The adults chase and hunt by convention.

When the grown-ups come back with the meat
They scramble and stumble, compete
***To play with and feed
***The puppies—indeed
They’ll trip over each other’s big feet!

When playing, they twitter and squeak,
And chatter like birds in a clique.
***When lost they go, “Hoo,
***I’m here. Where are you?”
And they bark, which means “Hark!” so to speak.

They hunt for their food by their wit,
For a zebra that’s young or unfit.
***Up to two days they’ll trot
***On savannas, quite hot,
After prey—these strong dogs rarely quit.

To prepare for a hunt they will nuzzle
And lick one another’s broad muzzle.
***They get very excited
***When zebras are sighted.
(To me that’s not much of a puzzle.)

While moving around a large herd
The Cape hunting dogs, self-assured,
***Will stealthily slink
***So slow they don’t blink,
While observing their prey (take my word).

When they spot a large beast that looks “right”
They’ll sprint towards that zebra and bite.
***Disemboweling’s their plan;
***They’ll bite off what they can.
With tails wagging, the poor beast they’ll smite.

They’ll bring back lots of meat which they’ll share
With the young and the old—that’s just fair,
***Then frolic and play
***For the rest of the day.
As for zebras tomorrow? BEWARE!

— Martin Elster

[Allen Tice]

Martin (and others),

thinking that limericks are under-rated as works of art, and that they all too easily escape their author's control, I was about to make a change in my little example (and also to ask some moderators whether a "serious" limerick oughtn't be placed -- or moved to -- the protective umbrella of Non-Metrical verse), when WHAMBO, you laid out a clever sequence of fifteen in a row on a single subject !!

I am humbled.

Just the same, I wonder if you wouldn't want yours in Non-Metrical or some other sheltered place, since you almost certainly will want to publish them somewhere (and you might not know where yet).

This entire page is secure since I put this in Drills and Amusements with a "{noindex}{/noindex}" code out of fear of being jumped on again by one of our nice moderators, and since I probably didn't pay enough attention to a relevant discussion or statement of policy; but where do efforts at "serious" limericks go? Could they be posted in Metrical? Could this thread be moved there, or split into two threads: one for Martin, and one for me? What's the current consensus on limericks?

- Allen Tice

[Janice D. Soderling]

Well, old brick, since you have now fathered a multiple-particpant thread that will probably attract limerick buffs (and there are lots lurking in the bushes) the best thing, methinks, would be to leave it in John's capable hands and under the aegis of the code you installed.

D&A also draws comments and cheers from other participants (as you will see most recently perhaps in the Bad Poetry thread).

You won't get much more than that at Non-Met, methinks, but FYI there is no law, by-law, statute, decree, edict, rule, or guideline against posting a single limerick at our esteemed non-metrical site.

If it is non-metrical, and you call it poetry, we are all ears!

[Allen Tice]

I beg to differ here on nomenklatura. I am a youngish, robust, free-range brick, if I be brick.

Nonetheless, thank you for the advice. However, following the reasoning given in Post #6 below, I will put future limericks in Metrical.

(Who's mortar, if I'm like brickish?)


PS from post #7: Metrical it shall be.

- Allen Tice

[Michael Cantor]

I'm a little puzzled by the discussion. Limericks are - when done properly - are metrical and rhymed. Why the mention of non-Met?

Secondly - the bouncy, jaunty form seems to lend itself to humor - and twists. Which is what yours does, Allen. It's a keeper.

But a limerick without a twist is like a ham sandwich without the ham or mustard - or cheese, or pickles, or lettuce. A string of them has to snap, crackle and pop to work - each has to be strong on its own. When there are inversions, they have to be clearly deliberate and humorous, not forced and flailing. Ergo - sorry, Martin, but no gold stars for stringing together fifteen limericks unless they're fifteen very good limericks.

Additionally, limericks are so common, and so easy that I think it would be more of a challenge if the thread had more of a theme. Just to say, "Hey, gang, let's write a limerick!" doesn't really click for me. Everybody will drag out the used limericks they have in the attic, and away we'll go. Why not pick a theme, Allen - "hair", for example, since you started it, or even dogs, or Presidential dogs (have to stay one step ahead of Martin, who has trunks of doggie poems in every room of his home), or dogs with bad hair days.

[Allen Tice]

Michael: Yay! I wanted to go to Metrical.
Thanks for the kind word on the Beef-Hive hairdo. Much appreciated.

OK, Metrical it shall be, for the future.


- Allen Tice

[Janice D. Soderling]

Michael, what would we do without you! I thought there was a line at non-met which gathered in limericks but I see that there isn't.

This is what it says.

Free verse, unmetered rhymed verse, forms such as sestinas, pantoums, ghazals, etc. when they are unmetered, prose poems, and syllabics -- post & critique. Serious writing and professional attitude are expected.

I must have dreamed it. Or maybe I am just a big old hog and want everybody to come to Dee and Me (sounds like a comedy team but we are serious as all get-out).

Folks, don't come dragging your old limericks and suchlike to Non-Met. We don't want them.

And Alan, how many times do I have to tell you that "brick" is a compliment.

And as for who is mortar, I guess it is Michael, he helps hold the structure together with his sharp memory and long experience.

And others who help keep me straightened out. Thanks, Jan.

[John Whitworth]

Can I say again that the man who knows all there is to know about limericks is Robert Conquest and the definitive essay on them is to be found in Conquest's 'The Abomination of Moab'? I think limerick sequences, I mean a poem each of whose stanzas is a limerick, are a separate art form.

[Holly Martins]

I tried to write a sad limerick but failed - the form insists on comedy. Can anyone bring a tear to this leathery old cheek with a sad one?