|
Notices |
It's been a while, Unregistered -- Welcome back to Eratosphere! |
|
|
02-07-2016, 03:11 PM
|
Member
|
|
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: England
Posts: 188
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jayne Osborn
Sylvia, I defy anyone to top that - it's deliciously dark!
A sure winner, I'd say.
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ann Drysdale
A perfect response to the brief. Brava!
|
Thirded.
Wonderful black humour.
|
02-08-2016, 08:57 AM
|
Member
|
|
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Suffolk
Posts: 1,246
|
|
Thanks, Alan!
|
02-08-2016, 09:50 AM
|
|
Member
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 12,945
|
|
Yup. That's the winner, But there are still three other places to fill.
|
02-08-2016, 12:17 PM
|
Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Paris, France
Posts: 5,397
|
|
Excellent, Sylvia! But I won't give it the kiss of death by saying you-know-what.
|
02-08-2016, 01:31 PM
|
Member
|
|
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Suffolk
Posts: 1,246
|
|
Ha! Thanks, Brian, very thoughtful - and thanks, John. I expect I'm in for a big disappointment.
|
02-08-2016, 02:54 PM
|
|
Member
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 12,945
|
|
Oh no, I don't think so. I cant think of what else could be done in that line. Mine is a goodish poem but it doesn't really fit the rubric unless you are prepared to stretch a point. 'Tons and tons' has to be two 'tons'.
Charlie's is fun but has the same problem. Humph!
But I expect Bazza and his countlss aliases is confecting something.
Last edited by John Whitworth; 02-08-2016 at 02:57 PM.
|
02-08-2016, 05:50 PM
|
Member
|
|
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: London
Posts: 994
|
|
I weigh a ton, and look it too: there’s simply no disguising
The puckered rolls of adipose I’ve got from gourmandising.
There’s very little I would deem unsavoury or icky.
If carbon-based, I’ll chug it down: I’m really not too picky.
This predilection grieves my wife-I struggle to appease her
When I’ve been collared crunching chips directly from the freezer,
Or gobbling a sausage roll that’s feculent and stinking,
Or drinking cooking oil (or something else not meant for drinking.)
She’ll wring her hands, comparing my addiction to a junkie’s,
But truth be told, I genuinely couldn’t give a monkey’s.
I’ll turn and walk away from her the moment she starts bitching
And pluck a goldfish from the bowl to swallow, live and twitching.
I’ll fill my tum with anything from compost to polenta,
From steak and kidney pudding to a bit of rat placenta,
From KFC and egg-fried rice to acorns, leaves and catkins…
But if I ever reach two tons, I’m going on the Atkins.
Last edited by Rob Stuart; 02-09-2016 at 04:52 PM.
|
02-08-2016, 05:58 PM
|
|
Administrator
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Middle England
Posts: 6,954
|
|
Hilarious, Rob!
So that's a win for Sylvia, a win for you, I reckon... two spots left for the rest of us to fight over.
(No offence to our US friends) ...but gotten?? How about:
Or gobbled some old bit of cheese that’s gone all green and woolly.
Jayne
PS. Cross-posted with you within two minutes. And I see you've already had the same thought!
|
02-09-2016, 05:38 AM
|
Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Paris, France
Posts: 5,397
|
|
[Deleted for reasons of paranoia]
Last edited by Brian Allgar; 03-05-2016 at 12:54 PM.
|
02-09-2016, 05:44 AM
|
Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Paris, France
Posts: 5,397
|
|
Very funny, Rob.
On the subject of Americanisms, and to avoid the double 'fish', what about changing
xxAnd fish a goldfish out the bowl
to something like
xxAnd grab a goldfish from its bowl
?
|
|
|
Thread Tools |
|
Display Modes |
Linear Mode
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Member Login
Forum Statistics:
Forum Members: 8,403
Total Threads: 21,890
Total Posts: 271,301
There are 3027 users
currently browsing forums.
Forum Sponsor:
|
|
|
|
|
|