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  #11  
Unread 02-22-2018, 11:54 AM
Matt Q Matt Q is online now
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They flee from me (Valentine’s night special)

Well, perhaps it is unwise to,
but I’m planning to surprise you,
because today’s a very special day.

Now I’m pacing in the dark
while I’m waiting in the park;
I know you like to walk from work this way.

And it’s true I do feel nervous,
still, there’s no one to observe us,
and I’ve cleaned my teeth and shaved and had a bath.

And I’m sure it will go fine;
I just need my opening line.
No time to waste: you’re walking down the path.

Now I don’t want to blow it
So I pick my favourite poet:
Sir Thomas Wyatt. Now I cannot miss!

Well it’s too late to change tack,
so I open up my mac,
and speak the words: ‘dear heart, how like you this?’


----
Apparently Americans aren't familiar with the word "mac". It's a Mackintosh -- a full-length raincoat.
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  #12  
Unread 02-06-2019, 07:04 PM
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RCL RCL is offline
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Here's a bump up of last year's offerings for the sacred day of Valentine, especially to note the last two by Matt Q.

Any new contributions?
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Ralph
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  #13  
Unread 04-26-2019, 04:27 PM
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Gail White Gail White is offline
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What, no women entered this? I'll try to think of something.

Okay, here’s one.

SONG, IN IMITATION OF CHRISTINA ROSSETTI, AND
BEGINNING WITH A LINE BY EDMUND WILSON

My brain is like a piece of cheese
that quivers with a million mites.
My brain is like a fast ballet
where all the dancers split their tights.
My brain is like a Ferris wheel
whose rusted gears have ceased to work.
My brain is bleaker than all these
because my love is such a jerk.

My brain is like a wildebeest
that hears a lurking lion roar.
My brain is like a movie crowd
stampeding for the exit door.
My brain is on a shopping spree,
the birthday of my life has come!
Because my love is such a jerk
and finally I’ve dumped the bum.

Last edited by Gail White; 04-30-2019 at 08:49 PM.
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  #14  
Unread 05-06-2019, 11:50 AM
Felicity Teague Felicity Teague is offline
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Nice one, Gail (especially for the wildebeest) :-)
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  #15  
Unread 05-22-2019, 02:15 PM
Jim Hayes Jim Hayes is offline
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My Only Love

I love this boyish, tennis waist,
This chin, this nose, that noble poise,
Although I note with some distaste,
Those lines like lace about the eyes.
I love the timbre of this voice
That rings enticing to my ear,
Adore the way no vulgar price
Denies me things I must have, dear.

You give me all your love and passion,
Not one scintilla do I lack
When I reciprocate I ration
My love for you - but hey, stand back
For just a moment and see why,
you worship me as much as I.
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  #16  
Unread 05-27-2019, 07:43 PM
Jim Moonan Jim Moonan is offline
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Gail, great poem!
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  #17  
Unread 05-28-2019, 04:29 PM
Andrew Szilvasy Andrew Szilvasy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Matt Q View Post
They flee from me (Valentineís night special)

Well, perhaps it is unwise to,
but Iím planning to surprise you,
because todayís a very special day.

Now Iím pacing in the dark
while Iím waiting in the park;
I know you like to walk from work this way.

And itís true I do feel nervous,
still, thereís no one to observe us,
and Iíve cleaned my teeth and shaved and had a bath.

And Iím sure it will go fine;
I just need my opening line.
No time to waste: youíre walking down the path.

Now I donít want to blow it
So I pick my favourite poet:
Sir Thomas Wyatt. Now I cannot miss!

Well itís too late to change tack,
so I open up my mac,
and speak the words: Ďdear heart, how like you this


----
Apparently Americans aren't familiar with the word "mac". It's a Mackintosh -- a full-length raincoat.
Matt,

Don't know how I didn't see this two years ago. This is great fun and would almost certainly get picked up by Melissa Balmain's Light, and probably others, if you were to send it out in the lead-up to next year's Valentine's Day.

Two nits (not that you asked):
and Iíve cleaned my teeth and shaved and had a bath.
The "and" breaks the rhythm and this piece needs a perfect rhythm. I'd cut it and change the punctuation leading in.

The first two lines are trochaic tetrameter, and that pairs well with the pent that ends the stanzas. But this is trimeter: "Now I donít want to blow it." If you want the meter the same, just uncontract "don't."

Anyway, this was fun.
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