[John Whitworth]

The last NS Competition, writing parodies of Hopkins or Coleridge or someone else, was won, among others, by Bazza and Bill. Hearty cheers to them. One of them got the fiver. I don't think any Spheriean had a go except me and I DIDN'T WIN.

The new comp is to expound in 100 words of 'primitive language' some abstruse philsophical doctrine by some named philosopher possibly. Care to try Heidegger? What is 'primitive language'? Search me.

By 30 September to the usual email address. I had all this written down oin my shopping list which I lost in Argos. If Bazza or somebody can get it down properly I'd be most grateful.

I have the whole of Catholic Doctrine as I understand it in 97 words. I wouldn't generally be so rude but we have had the little fellow here in his ice-cream van for a bit too long. Did you know that Woman Priests are as big a sin as mass pederasty? Well they are. He says so.

The Catholic Truth Society

God Word Holy Writ.
Holy Writ Good Book.
God He Holy Three,
God the Father, God the Son
And God the Holy Spook.

Holy Three is Holy One,
Three-in-one and One-in-three,
Holy Christianity.
Holy Writ some shit
But God tell True to me.

Holy True is Holy Church.
Holy Church is what I say.
Who I? I Pope.
Who you? You Dope.
Pope Rules. OK.

I Pope Big Hat,
I Pope Good Cook,
I Pope say that
I Pope Best Book
For God the Father, God the Son
And God the Holy Spook.