Eratosphere Forums - Metrical Poetry, Free Verse, Fiction, Art, Critique, Discussions Able Muse - a review of poetry, prose and art

Forum Left Top

Notices

Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Unread 03-03-2018, 06:27 PM
Jayne Osborn's Avatar
Jayne Osborn Jayne Osborn is offline
Administrator
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Middle England
Posts: 6,950
Default Constipation

Our lovely Julie (Steiner) said this on my thread over on Metrical, delighting several of us:

It might be fun to replace the octave's semicolons and colons with full stops, to make it feel more constipated and "going nowhere." "

Now, in true Spectator and Oldie style, "you are invited to write a poem which includes the word ''constipated" or "constipation".

[I doubt anyone can say, "Here's one I wrote earlier" ]

Jayne
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Unread 03-03-2018, 09:08 PM
John Isbell John Isbell is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: TX
Posts: 6,630
Default

Now I am quite elated
to find I'm constipated,
since pooing unobstructed
in this loo I've constructed
could only lead to trouble.
My poo's interminable;
I view the passing spring
while passing not a thing,
and contemplate the plumbing
as my rear end is numbing.

Cheers,
John
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Unread 03-04-2018, 02:13 AM
Ann Drysdale's Avatar
Ann Drysdale Ann Drysdale is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Old South Wales (UK)
Posts: 6,667
Default

Er... here's one I wrote earlier...

Sonnet Composed Upon Westminster Tube Station

Earth has not anything to show more fine
Than that which underpins that mighty heart.
The same arrangement graces yours and mine
But London’s bowels are a world apart.
Embark not on another aimless wander
Go, operate thine Oyster and invest in
An hour or two to ride the rails and ponder
The intricacies of its great intestine.
Scraps of humanity are sucked inside,
Whirling with strangers in unwitting waltzes,
All thrown together in a breathless ride
And squeezed along by merry peristalsis.
Through any of its many mouths man passes
To creep unconstipated from its arses.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Unread 03-04-2018, 02:49 AM
Adrian Fry Adrian Fry is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Wiltshire, UK
Posts: 1,515
Default

I'm gummed up.
Blocked.
My anus overstocked.
Bowel choc full of lead.
NO EXIT up ahead.

I'm ram packed.
Stuck.
An overloaded truck.
Lower gut is cruel
To so withhold a stool.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Unread 03-04-2018, 03:58 AM
Brian Allgar Brian Allgar is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Paris, France
Posts: 5,391
Default

[deleted - why does this site double-post when I try to edit an existing post?]

Last edited by Brian Allgar; 03-04-2018 at 04:03 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Unread 03-04-2018, 04:02 AM
Brian Allgar Brian Allgar is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Paris, France
Posts: 5,391
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jayne Osborn View Post
[I doubt anyone can say, "Here's one I wrote earlier" ]
Jayne
Well, Ann has already proved you wrong, and here's one I wrote earlier which may be considered 'on topic', although I admit that it doesn't actually include the word:

Donald’s clutching the solid gold rail
In the bathroom. The pain makes him wail;
He’s straining his arse,
But the motion won’t pass -
Another Republican fail.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Unread 03-04-2018, 05:27 AM
Nigel Mace Nigel Mace is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: The Borders, Andalucia and Italy
Posts: 1,537
Default

Ann, that is quite memorably brilliant.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Unread 03-04-2018, 06:04 AM
Jayne Osborn's Avatar
Jayne Osborn Jayne Osborn is offline
Administrator
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Middle England
Posts: 6,950
Default

Superb, Annie!

And fine efforts from John, Adrian and Brian. I hope it wasn't too much of a strain.

(I haven't managed to work one out myself; still stuck )

Jayne
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Unread 03-04-2018, 07:17 AM
Roger Slater Roger Slater is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: New York
Posts: 16,476
Default

As I age, it takes so long!
But lately I've grown used to it.
I once brought haiku to the loo,
but these days I bring Proust to it.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Unread 03-04-2018, 11:26 AM
RCL's Avatar
RCL RCL is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 6,761
Default How Big!!

Exultation is the Going

After Emily Dickinson

Exultation is the going
Of clots inside of me -
Past the organs -
Past the navel -
Into a sluggish Sea -

I’m never regular or fluid,
But Constipated understand
There’s divine intoxication
When my loads decide to land.

Franklin, 143



Caco Ergo Sum

Constipation of one’s poop
is gold for those with IBS-D.
Never in a gut-blocked group,
they’d race to one in a stampede
and drop their heavy baggy Pampers
For Adults they’ve roundly hated
as mockeries of stinky diapers
that made their parents so elated.
__________________
Ralph

Last edited by RCL; 03-04-2018 at 06:33 PM.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



Forum Right Top
Forum Left Bottom Forum Right Bottom
 
Right Left
Member Login
Forgot password?
Forum LeftForum Right


Forum Statistics:
Forum Members: 8,399
Total Threads: 21,840
Total Posts: 270,804
There are 1452 users
currently browsing forums.
Forum LeftForum Right


Forum Sponsor:
Donate & Support Able Muse / Eratosphere
Forum LeftForum Right
Right Right
Right Bottom Left Right Bottom Right

Hosted by ApplauZ Online