[John Whitworth]

'How pleasant to know Mr Lear...' 'How unpleasant to know Mr Eliot...' So begins Edward Lear's self-portrait in verse and T.S. Eliot's response. You are invited to continue either for a further fifteen lines, substituting the name of the poet of your choice, or sticking to the originals if you prefer. Entries to Competition 2616 by midday on 30 September or email lucy@spectator.co.uk

The Cautionary Tale had only one Spherean winner. Guess who? Yes Bill Greenwell, that mighty man. The Spectator is not allowing you to see copies of the magazine until they are a week old, so you'll have to wait to see Bill's excellent verse. It also means you have to wait for compatition news until I have got my own Speccie through the post about midday Friday, a day and a bit later than was usual.

This one looks a goodie, don't you think? So much so that I did my own,
just like that. I'll give you it on a response to the thread.

[John Whitworth]

OK. Here's my take on this. Or my nice take. I'm at work on my nasty one.

How Pleasant to Know Wendy Cope,

How pleasant to know Wendy Cope,
A poet of true popularity,
No dismal dispenser of dope
But a model of balance and clarity.

Who speaks to the tests of the times
In a language concise and untrendy?
Who is mistress of metres and rhymes?
My answer is totally Wendy.

Who speaks of the woe that is woman
In thrall to the mess that is man?
Who shows her condition is human?
Wendy Cope is the coper who can.

Let me give you a toast in dry sherry
To this model of Faith and of Hope,
With a Charity makes us all merry.
How pleasant to know Wendy Cope.

[Martin Elster]

That's brilliant, John.

Martin

[Martin Elster]

How Pleasant to Know Thomas Hardy

How pleasant to know Thomas Hardy,
That defender of all the world’s fauna,
From bovine to frog to iguana.
As upfront as a child, never arty,

Too frank to put on any airs,
He once crawled in a pen to envision
How a sheep felt. He wrote with precision
About kindness to horses or hares.

A hobby that caused him vexation
Was hunting. So incomprehensible!
That nimrods deemed creatures dispensable
Was a symptom of Man’s domination

Of nature. For Tom saw the earth—
With her hedgehogs, her kittens, her birds,
Her human and wildebeest herds—
As a place where all creatures have worth.

M. J. E.

[John Whitworth]

Thank you Martin. And let me extend my congratulations for your Hardy poem which is, in Brando-speak, a real contender. I didn't know about the sheep. How interesting and how much in Hardy's favour it is. I would prefer the stanza to run this way. It seems to run better. What do you think?

[Curtis Gale Weeks]

Wendy Cope is the coper who can.

Well this was just wry. This is the point where I actually LOL'd.

[Terese Coe]

Originally Posted by John Whitworth

OK. Here's my take on this. Or my nice take. I'm at work on my nasty one.

How Pleasant to Know Wendy Cope,

How pleasant to know Wendy Cope,
A poet of true popularity,
No dismal dispenser of dope
But a model of balance and clarity.

Who speaks to the tests of the times
In a language concise and untrendy?
Who is mistress of metres and rhymes?
My answer is totally Wendy.

Who speaks of the woe that is woman
In thrall to the mess that is man?
Who shows her condition is human?
Wendy Cope is the coper who can.

Let me give you a toast in dry sherry
To this model of Faith and of Hope,
With a Charity makes us all merry.
How pleasant to know Wendy Cope.

John,

It's in the money. It's in the zone. It's in the light. Again. An unpretentious, almost-but-not-quite-childlike (which makes it lovable) effusion of charm and love. I generally start marveling in S2 and laughing in S3.

[Martin Elster]

Originally Posted by John Whitworth

Thank you Martin. And let me extend my congratulations for your Hardy poem which is, in Brando-speak, a real contender. I didn't know about the sheep. How interesting and how much in Hardy's favour it is. I would prefer the stanza to run this way. It seems to run better. What do you think?

Thanks, John! I think my poem still needs work, though, which I'm going to do now. A couple of the lines don't sound right, and I now think it should end with "is a place where all creatures have worth" instead of on the voles and birds line. I think that would make for a stronger ending. So, I'll repost it when I get it to sound better.

I'm not clear on what you mean by the stanza running "this way." Are you referring to your stanza or mine?

Hardy was also a famous cat lover. I'm wondering if I should replace one of those animals like the vole or horse with a cat.

Martin

Added in: I made a revision of the Hardy poem above. I'm wondering if it sounds better. I think it does, but I'm never positive about these things.

[Martin Elster]

Originally Posted by Curtis Gale Weeks

Wendy Cope is the coper who can.

Well this was just wry. This is the point where I actually LOL'd.

Me, too. John, you have so many nice alliterations.

[Martin Elster]

Originally Posted by John Whitworth

I would prefer the stanza to run this way. It seems to run better. What do you think?

I think I know what you mean about the abba rhymes. I like it that way, 'cause it's a little bit different.

Martin