[Allen Tice]

john John JOHN John!

I, too, know zero x zero, and trust my deeply buried instincts. You are amusing.

[RCL]

The motto of the university
due to its perversity
when terminating noble Kim
should, perhaps, now be, in sum,
thanks to Anna’s beating drum,
Cogito ergo scum?

[Erik Olson]

To the Patron (Dean)

Art has the power to praise or murder you:
a comic strides, a lion on pay-per-view,
fires rich material since poorly fired—
his snaps are killing you, your boot inspired.
Some bloom to geniuses when cushions burst;
some blest in softest foliage lose thirst.
Strange logic, does it work? You shook the bays,
poets' new quarrels rival Shakespeare plays;
one must find silly or abysmal wrongs,
drink satire up or stream out protest songs.
They are to you, this anti-Chester club,
as Milton was no less to Bezelbub.
Bravo! I know why you refuse to speak,
your secret tactics work not if they leak.
d

[Lightning Bug]

After Monty Python's "Spam" sketch(available on YouTube):

Scene: Man and woman enter a diner and walk to the counter. Behind a waitress/cashier a sign reads, "WinchEsteR UniverSity Poetry Conference And Book Sale Diner."


Man: Morning!
Waitress: Morning! Welcome to WE R SCABS Diner.
Man: Well, what've you got?
Waitress: Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and scab; egg bacon and scab; egg bacon sausage and scab; scab bacon sausage and scab; scab egg scab scab bacon and scab; scab sausage scab scab bacon scab tomato and scab.
Poets: Scab scab scab scab...
Waitress: ...scab scab scab egg and scab; scab scab scab scab scab scab baked beans scab scab scab and scab.
Poets: Scab! Lovely scab! Lovely scab!
Waitress: ...or Lobster Thermidor a Crevette with a mornay sauce served in a Provencale manner with shallots and aubergines garnished with truffle pate, brandy and with a fried egg on top and scab.
Wife: Have you got anything without scab?
Waitress: Well, there's scab egg sausage and scab, that's not got much scab in it.
Wife: I don't want ANY scab!
Man: Why can't she have egg bacon scab and sausage?
Wife: THAT'S got scab in it!
Man: Hasn't got as much scab in it as scab egg sausage and scab, has it?
Poets: Scab scab scab scab... (Crescendo through next few lines...)
Wife: Could you do the egg bacon scab and sausage without the scab then?
Waitress: Urgghh!
Wife: What do you mean 'Urgghh'? I don't like scab!
Poets: Lovely scab! Wonderful scab!
Waitress: Shut up!
Poets: Lovely scab! Wonderful scab!
Waitress: Shut up! (Poets stop) Bloody Poets! You can't have egg bacon scab and sausage without the scab.
Wife: I don't like scab!
Man: Sshh, dear, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your scab. I love it. I'm having scab scab scab scab scab scab scab beaked beans scab scab scab and scab!
Poets: Scab scab scab scab. Lovely scab! Wonderful scab!
Waitress: Shut up!! Baked beans are off.
Man: Well could I have her scab instead of the baked beans then?
Waitress: You mean scab scab scab scab scab scab... (but it is too late and the Poets drown her words)
Poets: (Singing elaborately...) Scab scab scab scab. Lovely scab! Wonderful scab! Scab sca-a-a-a-a-ab scab sca-a-a-a-a-ab scab. Lovely scab! Lovely scab! Lovely scab! Lovely scab! Lovely scab! Scab scab scab scab!

[Ann Drysdale]

What does "scab" mean in the US in relation to an industrial action? Is it the same as in the UK?

[Lightning Bug]

Ann,

My bet would be that they are the self-same word in that respect.

b

[Ann Drysdale]

That's what I feared. I hoped I was just being paranoid.

[Allen Tice]

It has just exactly the right amount of wit.

[Erik Olson]

That's a clever adaptation Lightening Bug.