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Unread 01-16-2021, 04:51 PM
Coleman Glenn Coleman Glenn is online now
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Since this is up again I’ll reply, and then this can slide down. Thanks for all the help on it!

Aaron, you’re right that this is a minor poem with no aspirations to be anything else. I don’t know if it’s quite jokey enough to qualify as light verse but it’s in the neighborhood, anyway. I’m glad it worked for you, and especially that you found the sharp shifts in tone to be enjoyable rather than just jarring. In any case, I had fun writing it, and I hoped it would resonate with fellow readers of the sonnets who roll their eyes a bit at the insistence that the fair youth owes it to the world to reproduce.

Larry, nice to meet you on here. I have loved reading your erudite comments on other poems, and it’s a treat to have you comment on mine. I’m a relative ignoramus, and I love the way you highlight allusions and echoes that I’d totally miss otherwise. So, thanks! Sonnet 11 has the image of a seal in its closing couplet: “She carved thee for her seal, and meant thereby, / Thou shouldst print more, not let that copy die.” As I mentioned in a previous comment, “waxen fruit” is a mixed metaphor that I’m stubbornly clinging to; I hadn’t thought of the “waxing moon” parallel, but I’m happy for any more readings that justify the line. “Fairly fine” was originally “fairly fair,” punning on that Elizabethan meaning, but I modernized it a bit so that “spiel” wouldn’t feel so out of place. And yes, I like that “false fruits” could hint at a suspicion of infidelity - I stumbled into that, but it is a very Shakespearean concern.

Last edited by Coleman Glenn; 01-16-2021 at 05:20 PM.
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