You, still dissembling away,
post but to keep the fools at play.

FIAT
The thread expressing such positions
about your breath, your weird conditions,
unfortunately, should not expect
my acquiescence in the least respect!

Erik, I come from the far future or else centuries before,
so my grasp of the when of whom I am talking to can miss the barn door.
That air of disstinktion flew from a craving to please.
All I wanted was gallantry, not to swing from the trees.
I failed to perfume or perform like Shakespearean heroes,
making ill wind blow good or bend ones out of zeroes.

Hey guys, if you're going to turn another thread into a Vanity Post, at least do it well. These last few stink. You'll have to do better, Allen, if you want to remain the brightest ten year old at the party.

Michael seems to have confused this with a workshop thread. In those threads, his insistence on high standards serves us all well.

I don't see any reason to be offended by Spherians having fun, regardless of how good or bad the resulting verse may be. From what I've seen, those who want to encourage quality in D&A do so by applauding the stuff they most like.

To Stink or Not to Stink

Bad faith and breath distilled as words
reek as the Asshole's latest turds.

His bardless breath, we have observed,
forms gastric fecal bombs he’s stirred

and greater logorrhea spurred
toward the Scatological Absurd,

where a gaseous mind makes words
from thoughts—as human food makes turds.

The silly party stinks less than the Pooper;
to pin some grievance upon every trooper,
he tries to join them like it was his class
but finds what children play is pin the ass.

FIAT
The thread expressing such positions
about your breath, your weird conditions,
unfortunately, should not expect
my acquiescence in the least respect*!

* The amusements’ chill shade after crit-overkill
is where sergeants-at-drills have their own stringent fill:
Wait till Cromwell invades your lax bacchanal
with a voice from the grave—absolutely anal.

I've done just enough to offend.
My purpose was rather to mend.
Mike thinks I don't care
For his air debonair,
But doggies will pant on a friend.

If he places his nose next my nozzle
I'll show he's much more than schlimazel.
With my voice that's now scented
With a drink I invented,
We'll bay in duets as we sozzle.

Those others who labor to score
With efforts I'll simply ignore,
Don't understand why
A boy such as I
Remembers things others deplore.

I've decided to also employ Porthos, Athos, and, of course, that manly manly manly scent, Aramis!

Sorry, guys, but I haven't changed my mind. Most of the stuff on this thread would barely have made it into the high school paper. There was a time when Drills and Amusements was not only amusing - but good. Someone would come up with an idea - and usually post a poem or two - and the emphasis was exactly the same as the Deep Drills section. Not just to post a poem, but to post the best, and usually funniest, poem possible. We still have some threads like that, but more and more often this Board is simply used as an excuse to post a poem, and then come up with a theme as an afterthought (not this case, Allen - but many others - you actually had a theme and no poem) and it becomes more and more of a Vanity Board. And occasionally I say something.

So - getting back to the Drills part of it, I'll give Ralph a D, Eric a D- (maybe "although it wasn't super-dooper" or something with "stupor" would help), and Allen a gentleman's C.

Lest we forget, I originally started this thread in General Talk as a call-out for ideas for a poem I contemplate, and I didn't include any verse. Then the thread was swept up by Fairy Godmother Jayne and suddenly I was resting unprepared and featherless amidst sharp drill bits, augers, etc. Thank you for your grade. I have often desired to post a grade on a deed of yours, but I'll rest my oars right now.

Participate, Vacate, and Shut Up
 

And we attribute stench to him
because he crits ad hominem.

But if the proctors cannot see it,
all I can say is holy sheeeeit!