The wino said it was a crying shame
the liquor store went up in flames today
before he'd had a drink of same old same
old fortified red vino. Beaujolais
is stupefying, come back baby gin
and tonic satisfying, more than twice
the kick ambrosia brings with it. His sin
was budgeting champagne with vice, a price
he gladly sadly paid; the rum and Coke
which he preferred so leisurely went first
and as he staggered over, one blitzed bloke
cross town; he swam the depths of ocean's thirst,
panhandled for more coins to spend, sincere
enough until he drowned for lack of beer.

To Papa, Mama, and Baby Bear's shame
they left their liquor store unlocked today.
When Goldilocks came in it was the same
M.O. She went first for the Beaujolais,
too sweet, too sweet, how about the gin?
Too dry, too dry, if they'd distill it twice
with juniper then it would be a sin
to leave behind, a steal at twice the price
of thievery, but mixing it with Coke
like rum would be atrocious, not the first
dumb thing she'd done. She left a sorry bloke
out in the parking lot, his avid thirst
for blonds and getaway cars hot, sincere.
She came out with: one bourbon, scotch and beer.

Budweiser isn't beer, not what I'd call beer. A kind of lager perhaps?

Apologies - I've just deleted my entries. I realized that for eighteen months, I've been posting them here and winning zilch. Last month and this, I didn't post them - and won in both issues. So I am exercising the better part of valour.

Tut, Brian, tut. But the best of luck.

Maybe we should move The Oldie comp threads to Deep Drills?

(But Brian, when you don't win the rest of us get a slight look-in, at least! :p)

Jayne

Meant to ask long ago Jayne, but can you send me the password, or whatever, for the said Deep Drills?

I dunno, Jayne. I'm not saying there's a causal connection - it could just be that the two entries I didn't post were the only ones that Tessa liked in the last 20 months. Still ... seems a bit funny, know what I mean?

Nigel,
A PM with the password is winging its way to you.

Brian,
Yes, I can see why you might make a connection... but we do know that posting here isn't regarded as ''Previously published'' in the case of our Oldie entries, unlike some other comps. None of us would have won if that was so!

Let's see if anyone else would prefer The Oldie comp on Deep Drills... or not...

Hmm . . .as it happens, I didn't post the winning Wrong Apples piece here, but the previous eight Oldie winners, yes.

I doubt if there's a causal connection, Brian, just coincidence. However, an argument for Deep Drilling the Oldie comp like the other two would be to avoid having early drafts picked up by web-crawlers as D & A doesn't seem to be protected in the same way as the DE, Metrical, and NM forums.

It would also mean that only those Eratospherians who were really interested would climb the walls of the competition madhouse.