Thank you for such an in-depth commentary and deep dive into the work. I canít express my appreciation.
You raise a lot of good points. I think I can distill them down to a fundamental disagreement with the strength of negative capability? Maybe I misunderstand the idea, but your post, in general, seems to enact an irritable reaching after fact and reason. I hope Iím not wrong or completely ignorant in suggesting this? I might be Ė itís early and I had a bit to drink last night.
But you really articulate your point of view well, and I think a lot of what youíve offered will help me with future poems. Thank you!
The unusual line breaks you noticed early on was decided by the form. All the lines are set at four words.
I kind of thought the opening teased a rhyme with Bohemia (ďÖdrinks a /ÖĒ). But I thought this only half-seriously.
Thank you for the feedback. I think the effect a poem has on individual readers is various, but the key to a poemís ability to last. I always think a poem is kind of like a joke, where the end is the laugh (the means is the joke); itís much harder to say what the end is (though youíve done well!) and much more difficult to achieve the means.
So Iím grateful for your evocative description of the effect/end this poem had on you.