John, I like the beginning, and for the most part I like the rest, too, but I get distracted by questions as I go along.
For example, in S2L1, how can one rise to air beneath the Nile without a diving bell?
Why does the "you" of the poem say All the work Khnum shaped is lost beneath the sand
"? We just saw them walking around the British Museum in S2. Did Khnum not shape the ancestors of modern humans?
Also, even the long-dead human hands that shaped this particular statue of Khnum are more likely to be lost beneath the silt
than the sand
, I think, since he's a river god.
Originally Posted by John Isbell
Oh yes - Egypt does of course have plenty of believers these days. But not in the ancient gods; and Islam does not involve burnt sacrifice to my knowledge.
Isn't the cooking smoke from ritually slaughtered goats at Eid al-Adha still "the smoke of sacrifice," even if the meat is eaten by humans rather than burnt up entirely as a holocaust? The name of the feast itself is "the Feast of the Sacrifice."
It's [burnt sacrifice is] quite rare in modern religion, I think. Hinduism?
Practitioners of Santerķa and Voodoo come to mind. Some of their blood sacrifices of animals are burnt offerings. Probably irrelevant to Egypt, though.
It might be nice to draw a more obvious parallel between a god who shaped humanity from clay and the humans who shaped this statue from...stone, is it? But maybe that obviousness isn't needed.
I hope some of this nit-pickiness is useful.