[Jerome Betts]

I shan't add to the growing nose-bag full of Tesco meat-and-meat-products gags: that would be flogging a dead horse... Carolyn Thomas-Coxhead)

But there may be money in dead horses, Carolyn. If the Spectator can flog a dead Richard the Third, can a request for verse on defunct equines be far behind? I think the Eratosphere Collective of Drillers and Amusers should assemble a precautionary bank of horse laughs in these days when the term ‘selling plater’ has acquired a strange new resonance.


Horses For Courses

While Fay loved Jean's finesse and flair
Her parents liked his fine cord breeches,
His sporting style and savoir faire
And rumours of his Swiss-banked riches.

Till one sad day her father tried
A question touching stud and stable,
And ‘Yes, I breed zem’, Jean replied,
But boldly added, ‘for ze table.’