[John Whitworth]

Forgive me, Jayne, for treading on your toes. I spent an age doing this then realised you had most kindly agreed to do it. Forgive me again!

Many congratulations to Gail White who brilliantly bears away the Chambers. Just think, Gail, only last month or was it the month before, and you could have had a tea-set

COMPETITION NO 149
Someone from the 'nudge unit' at No 10 wants us oldies to downsize. A poem, then, on any kind of 'Downsizing'. Maximum 16 lines.
Entries to 'Competition 149' by post The Oldie, 65 Newman Steet, London W1T 3EG, or email comps@theoldie.co.uk by 6th April.
Don't forget to include your postal address.

[George Simmers]

Downsizing? Daft idea.
My wife and ancient self are moving soon and upsizing.
If we downsized, where on earth would I put the books?

[Ann Drysdale]

But Gail! Hail Gail!

I hereby challenge you to a sonnet - Upon First Looking Into The Chambers Biographical Dictionary. Well done, you!

[Jayne Osborn]

Yes, John, I spent an age doing MY job too, only to find you'd already done it.

(See post on the other thread as well.)

It's a good job you're one of my best mates, innit?

(I've only been doing it for about... two years or something.)

Just kidding, everyone. John is too adorable to be cross with, though I might just rap his knuckles with a ruler when I see him.

Jayne

[John Whitworth]

Ah Jayne. Your words are daggers.

[Jayne Osborn]

Ah but John, they're only made of soft plastic - totally harmless

[Gail White]

Originally Posted by John Whitworth

Just think, Gail, only last month or was it the month before, and you could have had a tea-set.

I would have LOVED a tea set, but life is a sea of broken dreams.

As it is, I'm reading a lot of tiny biographies.

[Mary Moore]

Does the title have to be "Downsizing" or just the subject matter? Also does a poem in form stand a better chance than free verse?
Mary

[Jayne Osborn]

Hi Mary,

The winning poems never have titles in The Oldie. 'Down-sizing' is just the subject matter for this month's comp.

And free verse is unlikely to have a ghost of a chance. Make it rhyme!

Good luck. Nice to see another lady at D & A. We're a little thin on the ground.

Jayne

[John Whitworth]

Hutton, my American friends, was not Barbara or Betty but Len, an English batter of my youth.

Downsizing

When Mr Grubb, our teacher, who was strict
But fairly fair, announced that I was picked
Scorer and Twelfth Man in Fat Colin's team,
It changed my life. My life became a dream,
A dream of flashing drives that take me towards
My undefeated century at Lords,
Of Aussies routed with my double hat-trick -
The new Master of the ball-trick and the bat-trick?

Well no! I must be truthful: at the wicket,
On Fortune's cap I was not the very button.
This was real. This was earnest. This was cricket'
And I had no thoughts of being a second Hutton.
But to be young was (sometimes) very heaven,
In Colin's Second Junior Eleven.