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  #1  
Unread 10-20-2011, 02:26 AM
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John Whitworth John Whitworth is offline
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Default Speccie Take Six

The fiver for Bazza and places for Sam and me. We were all in excellent form, I thought. The new competition says 'Short Story' but I don't see why a short story shouldn't be in verse. I have never used the word 'rebarbative'. Is it something to do with indigestion?

NO. 2721: take six
You are invited to supply a short story that incorporates the following words: ‘rebarbative’, ‘solipsistic’, ‘lapidary’, consequential’, ‘plangent’, ‘gibbous’ (150 words maximum and please italicise or underline given words).
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Unread 11-01-2011, 06:33 AM
Jerome Betts Jerome Betts is offline
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Wot? No takers for this one?

A hot tip had brought Charlie Carruthers to this faded former colonial settlement with its rebarbative ex-pats and uncommunicative locals. Carruthers had a dream, a dream embodied in the furry huge-eyed shape of the hitherto unfilmed Giant Gibbous or Hump-Backed Lemur.

‘Today’s the day!’, he thought, as his 4WD headed out past the consequential monuments of the old regime with their lapidary lies and boasts. An end to his almost solipsistic obsession with the great beast . . .

Several hours later, his guide grew tense as they slipped cautiously through the forest’s dangling fronds, trying not to trigger plangent alarm-calls from Wrzl’s Ouzel high in the canopy. Was this the grove said to be the last refuge of the elusive giant? There was a flash of white – a first glimpse of a lemur silverback? – and a distant drone . . . the ubiquitous Attenborough had got there first!

Last edited by Jerome Betts; 11-01-2011 at 07:20 AM. Reason: Tweaks
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Unread 11-01-2011, 08:32 AM
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Susan d.S. Susan d.S. is offline
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I tried. The story that resulted is too silly for words.
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Unread 11-01-2011, 09:27 AM
Donna English Donna English is offline
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Jerome, it made me laugh! Loved Attenborough at the end. I can hear his mockyoumentary voice.

Good one
Donna

Last edited by Donna English; 11-01-2011 at 01:48 PM. Reason: wrote John instead of Jerome, oops, sorry
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Unread 11-01-2011, 11:30 AM
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John Whitworth John Whitworth is offline
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Jerome, Donna. This is John.

Withered Murder

His tone was so rebarbative
He could not be allowed to live.
I pushed him underneath a train.
His plangent pleas were all in vain.
I found I didn’t give a toss.
(It was a consequential loss)
But said in lapidary phrases,
‘You’re better pushing up the daises.
Your death is but a cold statistic
I am uncaring, solipsistic,
And much prefer to keen and croon
Beneath a pale and gibbous moon.’
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Unread 11-01-2011, 11:56 AM
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Susan d.S. Susan d.S. is offline
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John, a fun solution! But I don't get this line:

And much prefer to keen and croon

If he is cold and uncaring, why would he keen?

Susan
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Unread 11-01-2011, 01:15 PM
Minu Varghese Minu Varghese is offline
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Default My roommate's transcendence

During those days, when he used to tell me every morning about the adventures he had the previous night in his lucid dreams, I never dared discourage him, lest I snatch away his only means of escape from the ‘rebarbative claws of civilization’, as he called it.
However, as time passed, I seldom saw him awake, and heard less and less from him, except during those late midnight hours, when I woke up to the sound of plangent chants to find his gibbous, skeleton-like form crouched at a corner of the bed and muttering in an alien tongue. Solipsistic as in lucid dreams, the gifted student, whose name was once expected to become lapidary in history, concluded that there was nothing consequential to do in this world. That is why, I guess, he decided to do nothing except sleeping and dreaming, and finally, decided to stop breathing as well.

Last edited by Minu Varghese; 11-01-2011 at 02:51 PM. Reason: lapidary italisized
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Unread 11-01-2011, 01:47 PM
Donna English Donna English is offline
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Yikes! Sorry, Jerome! Sorry, John!

John, you killed it! Thanks for the second laugh.

Minu, good one--decided to stop breathing, HA!


Donna

Last edited by Donna English; 11-01-2011 at 02:46 PM. Reason: I'm a mess. I typed illed instead of killed.
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Unread 11-01-2011, 02:34 PM
Jerome Betts Jerome Betts is offline
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Thanks, Donna.

John, I suppose something like 'muse' could substitute for 'keen' if you agree with Susan's point?

Minu, ingenious. Maybe 'escape' better than 'escapism' in Line 2? (Typo in rebarbative in Line 3).

Wonder about the punctuation of the last line. Would it go better as, "That is why, I guess, he decided to do nothing except sleeping and dreaming, and, finally, decided to stop breathing at all."

The deadline is nigh - good luck to us all.
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  #10  
Unread 11-01-2011, 03:02 PM
Minu Varghese Minu Varghese is offline
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Thanks Donna
Jerome, I edited the post by making the changes you suggested, Thank you so much for pointing them out.
Interesting how different all the stories turn out to be! I hope there are more posts.
Susan, please post that silly story, if u can manage to put it into words. I am soo curious to read.
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