[John Whitworth]

Bill Greenwell and Chris O'Carroll kept up the honour of the Sphere in the Competition, as you can see. The new one is the sort of thing I really like. I hope you do too.

No. 2671: short cuts
You are invited to submit a poem in which the rhymed ending of each line is a truncated word (16 lines maximum). Please submit entries, by email where possible, to lucy@spectator.co.uk by midday on 27 October.

[Roger Slater]

Do you think this means that every line has to rhyme, or just that the lines that do happen to rhyme have to use truncated words?

[John Whitworth]

Yes I think every line has to rhyme.

Today I'm feeling very joyf.
I've got myself a lovely boyf.
Bring out a magnum of the bub.
Today I'm going to ditch my hub.
He's giving me a pile of hass.
I'm finished with the sorry bas.

[Roger Slater]

Thanks, John. I guess the key here is to do what you did in the final couplet, which is to make rhymes of the short forms when the full forms wouldn't rhyme. Otherwise you could just write an ordinary poem with feminine rhymes and clip the last syllable of each line, which isn't, in and of itself, that funny.

[Orwn Acra]

Roger, I don't understand. Didn't John do that to all the lines?

[Maryann Corbett]

Orwn, when I first read "boyf" I filled it out as "boyfull," on the model of "joyful." I see now that it ought to be "boyfriend." So yes, John rhymed short forms when the full forms wouldn't rhyme, but I didn't catch that right off: joyful, boyfriend, bubbly, hubby, hassle, bastard. (Bubbly and hubby are perilously close, though.)

[Roger Slater]

Yeah, you're right. I read too quickly and was thrown off track by the middle one, which would have come sort of close to being an actual rhyme compared to the final couplet. Point taken.

[Mary Moore]

Close Call

What happened was nearly catas.
The fellow at fault was a ras.
He put a lit cig
on her seat. Did she wigg!
Her bloomers came nearly unfas.

Mary E. Moore

[John Whitworth]

No, no Roger. His poem is quite long, about 2 pages, and, after an introductory stanza or so, all the lines end with truncated words. Harry Graham is best known for his ruthless rhymes, but he was a light verse man of some skill and aplomb - early 20th century, often known as Captain Harry Graham. My grandmother used to recite to me:

Mama,mama, oh what is this
That looks like strawberry jam?
Hush,hush, my dear, 'tis poor Papa
Run over by a tram

Nice one, Mary. These things are a lot trickier than they look.

[George Simmers]

Another writer fond of a clipped rhyme was Ira Gershwin, as in:

Dont mind telling you, in my humble fash
That you thrill me through, with a tender pash,
When you said you care, magine my emoshe
I swore then and there, permanent devoshe,
You made all other men seem blah
Just you alone filled me with ahhhhhhhh......

'S wonderful, 's marvellous
That you should care for me!