[John Whitworth]

As so often, Bazza alone carried the hopes of the Sphere, though Chris O'Carroll and Bill Greenwell were nearly there. This week's competition has already had me pondering and I now have a solution. I wonder whether Lucy meant to say 2010. I will email her and enquire.

No. 2681: triplicate
You are invited to submit a treble clerihew about a public figure who was prominent in 2009. Please email entries, where possible, to lucy@spectator.co.uk by midday on 12 January. .

[George Simmers]

2009!
I misread it, and on the bus yesterday composed this, which is definitely 2010.
I don't think I like the competition anyway. The chief merit of a clerihew is that it is short, sharp and rhythmically surprising. A triple one just becomes twelve lines of doggerel, like this rather grumpy example:

Charlie Gilmour
Wishes people would chill more.
Swinging from the Cenotaph
Was only meant for a laugh.

What's surprising is that despite his dad's loud asseveration
That nobody needs no education,
And despite seeming intellectually puny
This bloke gained a place at uni.

One, moreover, that is usually seen as a discerning
Place of learning.
A spokesman for Cambridge university
Claims that the admission of the occasional twerp proves the institution's commitment to inclusivity and diversity.

[Gail White]

I don't think an American is likely to win this one, or I would attempt to do a number on Sarah Palin.

[Janice D. Soderling]

Go for it Gail. She is as infamous abroad as at home.

[John Whitworth]

I thought a treble clerihew would be like this:


Andrew Strauss

Andrew Strauss
Proved a man and not a mouse.
After titanic clashes
He won the Ashes.

Andrew Strauss
Did not carp or grouse.
He was upbeat,
And it worked a treat.

Andrew Strauss
Had the nous
To return
With the urn.

[Roger Slater]

Barack Obama
had an American mama
but that's not enough when ya
may have been born in Kenya.

Barack Obama
could end the drama
and show that the birthers goof
if he merely offered proof.

Barack Obama
should get a note from the Dalai Lama
with a seal of approval from the Pontificate
saying "Jesus, too, lacked a birth certificate."

[Marion Shore]

Sarah Palin
has surged in the polls where once she was failin'.
So beware, you community organizers, healthcare fanatics, tree-huggers,
and left-leaning buggers.

But all you Joe Sixpacks, you'll find that she's tops--
This gal's got the chops,
blunt-spoken and hearty,
the perfect hostess for any Tea Party.

You won't hear her complaining about some endangered species.
No, it's easy to see she's
a hockey mom, a maverick, a pitbull with lipstick,
as smart as a dipstick.

[John Whitworth]

Come, come, Roger. Bertie Wooster, short for Bertram.

[Roger Slater]

Oops. It doesn't matter, though, since I didn't enter anything, half because I forgot and half because what I wrote didn't really cut the mustard.

[John Whitworth]

Well, all I managed was Strauss which I don't think has the legs to win either.