On the subject of babies and plugholes, John Whitworth has this one:
Bathwater Chorus
I know a rule that any fool
Should treat as more than maybe.
When you throw out the bathwater
You don't throw out the baby.
So listen up, my buttercup,
Pin back those hairy lugholes --
This rule of thumb, my sugarplumb:
Keep infants out of plugholes!
They gurgle and they gargle so
As out the liquid swishes.
Then horrorshow! Away they go
And mingle with the fishes!
So here's a song that can't be wrong
However bad the day be.
When you throw out the bathwater
You don't throw out the baby.
Or - down the pipe and down the drain
And down the Swanee River,
With joyous squawks they bob like corks
Across the sea forever.
Alas, alack, they won't come back,
Those dainty little putti.
They're all the same, the only game
They know's cosi fan tutti.
This little verse is true and terse
And clear as any gaby.
When you throw out the bathwater,
When you throw out the bathwater,
You're up the spout without a doubt
If you throw out -- so don't throw out,
NO, DON'T THROW OUT THE BABY!
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