Eratosphere Forums - Metrical Poetry, Free Verse, Fiction, Art, Critique, Discussions Able Muse - a review of poetry, prose and art

Forum Left Top

Notices

 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
  #1  
Unread 04-09-2025, 05:25 PM
Julie Steiner Julie Steiner is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: San Diego, CA, USA
Posts: 8,660
Default Rueda, "The Cluster of Grapes"

The grapes grown around Jerez, Andalusia — the birthplace of sherry — tend to be pale green, such as the palomino fino variety.


The Cluster of Grapes
by Salvador Rueda (Spain, 1857–1933)

DRAFT THREE:

Within a fringe of clingy tendrils, see
it dangle from the grapevine, filled with fire.
The dazzling sun behind, still moving higher,
ignites it as it swings translucently.

Clothed in untouched atoms’ purity,
its vigor floods the clement atmosphere.
Its grapes, a string of jadeite beads, appear
entangled in its stalk’s red coral tree.

The stalk, when shears release the cluster’s weight,
creates a kiss-like sound to agitate
the blood, which quickens at the crackling noise.

And as the vine lasciviously trembles,
the crackling noise of flying dew resembles
the gasping belly-laughter that is joy’s.


DRAFT TWO:

Within a fringe of clingy tendrils, see
it dangle from the grapevine, filled with fire.
The dazzling sun behind it, moving higher,
ignites it as it swings, translucently.

Clothed in untouched atoms’ purity,
its vigor floods the clement atmosphere.
Its grapes, a string of Asian beads, appear
entangled in its stalk’s red coral tree.

The stalk, when shears release the cluster’s weight,
gives off a kiss-like sound, to agitate
one’s blood to quicken at the crackling noise.

And as the vine lasciviously trembles,
the crackling noise of flying dew resembles
the gasping belly-laughter that is joy’s.


L6 was: its vigor floods the mellow atmosphere.



DRAFT ONE:

Within a clingy fringe of tendrils, see
it dangle from the grapevine, filled with fire.
The dazzling sun behind it, moving higher,
ignites it, and it sways, translucently.

Clothed in untouched atoms’ purity,
its wholeness floods the warming atmosphere.
Its grapes, a necklace from the East, appear
entangled in its stalk’s red coral tree.

The stalk, when severed from the cluster’s weight,
crackles like a kiss, to agitate
the blood and make it quicken at the noise.

And as the vine lasciviously trembles,
the patter of the flying dew resembles
that crackling ugly-laugh that’s none but joy’s.


El racimo de uvas

En un cairel de pámpanos asido,
vedlo colgando del parral ardiente ;
tras él se eleva el sol resplandeciente,
y a su trasluz colúmpiase encendido.

De virginales átomos vestido
vierte salud en el templado ambiente ;
sus uvas son como collar de oriente
a un rojo tallo de coral prendido.

Cuando se corta del racimo el peso,
el tallo cruje como el son de un beso
que conmueve la sangre acelerada.

Y al temblor de las pámpanas lascivas,
salta el rocío en gotas fugitivas
crujiendo como alegre carcajada.


LITERAL ENGLISH PROSE CRIB

The cluster of grapes

Within a clingy fringe of tendrils,
see it hanging from the flaming vine;
behind it rises the dazzling sun,
and with its translucency it swings, lit up.

Covered in virginal atoms,
it spills health into the temperate air/atmosphere;
its grapes are like a necklace from the orient
fastened to a red stalk of coral.

When the cluster’s weight is cut,
the stalk crackles like the sound of a kiss
that stirs the racing blood.

And at the trembling of the lascivious vines,
the dew leaps in runaway drops
crackling like (a) happy guffaw.

Last edited by Julie Steiner; 04-18-2025 at 06:03 AM. Reason: Draft Two posted
Reply With Quote
 

Bookmarks


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



Forum Right Top
Forum Left Bottom Forum Right Bottom
 
Right Left
Member Login
Forgot password?
Forum LeftForum Right


Forum Statistics:
Forum Members: 8,504
Total Threads: 22,602
Total Posts: 278,823
There are 3495 users
currently browsing forums.
Forum LeftForum Right


Forum Sponsor:
Donate & Support Able Muse / Eratosphere
Forum LeftForum Right
Right Right
Right Bottom Left Right Bottom Right

Hosted by ApplauZ Online