[John Whitworth]

If it's the thing you stick in his mouth to shut him up, that's a dummy. I like the first one best.
And, Jerome, re fish, yes I think a sardine from a tin is an object.

[Roger Slater]

THE PIN

I've lost my tiny little pin.
Disaster, I'm afraid.
Too bad I didn't also lose
the whole damn hand grenade.

[Max Goodman]

Thanks, John. You Brits have always got better names for everything. I've been calling it his phony nipple, but "dummy" is much more succinct. I guess the ending should be

It's not a joke to Dad or Mummy.
(Of course, I'm speaking of his dummy.)

Of course, neither of my attempts is a lament, not for the lost object.

Bob/Roger, another gem from you!

[Roger Slater]

Thank you, Max. I liked both your poems but your second poem more than your first, though you had me worried since I didn't see the punchline coming. Congratulations on the baby! There's really nothing better.

One more try:


Lament for a Lost Rabbit's Foot

I've lost the lucky rabbit's foot
I bought when I was ten,
and though I must admit my life
has not gone well since then

(bad health, bad marriage, bad divorce),
make no mistake about it:
life's bound get a whole lot worse
in years to come without it.

[Martin Elster]

An Important Object

Chasing squirrels yesterday afternoon
***I lost sight of my human.
***And then some big baboon
threw me in a van and we were zoomin’

towards another part of town. He halt-
***ed, hauled me out, and dragged
***me toward a cage. Whose fault
was it I ended up in here? I wagged

my tail to no avail and spent the night
***in this prison-like place.
***I understood the fright
in yelps and howls. Some of them would pace,

as if they kept a vigil, till done in.
***This morning my good master
***ushered me out. His sin?
My dog tag vanished. Ergo this disaster.