Ann, I had tried about a dozen words in place of "soulless." It is obviously a key moment -- whatever word it ends up being. I settled for soulless in view of Wordsworth's day job, feeling that he would not have resisted the opportunity to make the point. Now you have given me cause to re-think. Ouch!
If I have time I think I also need to disconnect the last two lines from Line 12 in order more strictly to follow the sonnet form.
But flattering indeed, I hope (!), to hear that I caused you chills.
Also, I have found a wonderful phrase, "lick-penny," which I think would read better than "rapacious" in Line 6.
All thoughts much welcomed. But time is running out.
Last edited by Martin Parker; 11-13-2011 at 06:18 AM.
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