All I have to offer at the moment is some tongue-in-cheek good news

I received this on my screen today as I opened the Eratosphere web page:
Congratulations!
Dear Ablemuse Visitor,
You are today's lucky visitor for: September 1, 2017.
Please complete this short survey and to say "Thank You" we'll offer you a reward worth over $50!
Which I did. Then this came up:
Thank you for completing the Ablemuse survey!
Because you helped provide extremely valuable consumer data on your experience, you may now choose (1) of the following exclusive rewards.
Please understand that these products are currently in extremely high demand, and if you leave this page without claiming your reward, we have no choice but to give another random visitor a chance to participate in our survey rewards program.
You have 00:03 min to select a reward or your spot will be given to someone else.
Here were my choices:
- Tactical Flashlight (Qty Left: 2)
- Virtual Reality Glasses/Qty Left: 5
- Luxury Skin Care Kit (Better than Botox) Qty Left: 3
- Male Testoserone Booster Qty Left: 4
- Visa Gift Card for $100/Qty Left: 0
I didn’t bite. Just clicked out and got back to the business of reading poetry, looking for crits. That's the real good news.