[Jerome Betts]

I say, Jeeves, have I been talking a lot of bally rot, recently?

I had not noticed any perceptible difference in your quotidian discourse, sir.

But, really, you know, I sense a strangeness in the old ambience.

Ah, in that case, sir, we may perhaps blame the readers of a leading weekly.

I say, dash it, why?

They have been set the task of anticipating Mr Faulks in his editing of your memoirs, sir.

What a fearful cheek! So the air is abuzz with blighters sticking their oars in, eh?

I think I perceive your meaning, sir,

Any idea who these scribbling merchants might be, Jeeves?

I believe the chief source of your discomfort, sir, is the notorious Whitworth-Allgar-Simmers syndicate.

Good Lord, Jeeves! Anything we can do?

Well, sir, as it is my afternoon off, I will go round and have a word with my Aunt Lucy . . .

[John Whitworth]

Noted. Expect a visit from Lord Sidcup in attack mode.

[Brian Allgar]

Frankly, I would have said that the man Betts sounds more like a case for Sir Roderick Glossop, the well-known loony doctor. But Jeeves assures me that Mr Betts is as sane as the next man, although he did add a phrase that rather went over my head: "Mutatis mutandis". Perhaps I ought to follow Jeeves's example and eat more fish.

[basil ransome-davies]

'Do you eat a lot of fish, Jeeves?'

'No, sir.'

'Oh, well, then it's just a gift, I take it; and if you aren't born that way there's no use worrying.'

'Precisely, sir.'

from 'The Aunt & the Sluggard'

[Brian Allgar]

"I am up against it a bit, Jeeves."

"I am sorry to hear that, sir. Can I be of any assistance?"

"Quite possibly you can, if you have not lost your grip. Tell me frankly,
Jeeves, are you in pretty good shape mentally?"

"Yes, sir."

"Still eating plenty of fish?"

"Yes, sir."

(from Right Ho, Jeeves)

[basil ransome-davies]

Aha, we've caught PGW out in one of his famous slips, writing prolifically over many decades & not always matching up his fictional data (not that it matters for comp purposes). I seem to recall that Conan Doyle, comparable in some respects, didn't consistently remember Watson's first name or where his wound was.

[Peter Goulding]

“Yo, Jeeves. You an’ me, we always bin tight, right?”
“I’m not sure I follow, sir.”
“Hey man, you my homie but you gotta wise up. Dis new dude, Faulks? He gonna update us, you dig?”
“I am a gentleman’s gentleman, sir. I am neither a gardener nor a highway engineer.”
“Man, you sure can be one helluva boregasm. You gotta see what dis guy is cookin’.”
“Is it fish,sir?”
“Jeeves, ma maaan. You gotta get wid it or dis guy’s gonna have yo ass.”
“I shall of course check my room but I can assure you donkeys will be remarkable by their absence.”
“Yo not gittin’ ma drift, Jeeves. Dis is no Y2K. Yo gotta learn to talk chimp else you gonna go from butler to butt-pirate.”
“Oh I see. Very well, sir, I shall try. By the way, your Aunt Dahlia is expecting you for lunch, erm, innit.”

[FOsen]

Come, Jeeves, let’s have no more of this wailing and gnashing of teeth over our forthcoming sequel. Such displays are, and I speak frankly, quite unbecoming of you. "As you say, sir. Nevertheless, one must acknowledge that none of the present auguries appear to be particularly propitious. Oh, yes. Doom attends us 'like a Wodehouse simile’, and all that tosh - but that’s simply one old cove in Kent who’s been posting crank comments. “Perhaps, sir, but Fleet Street is hardly more encouraging. I believe the mildest sentiments I’ve read are: ‘lamentable folly’; ‘absurd anachronism’; and ‘relics best forgotten’. Great heavens, Jeeves, I'd no inkling our collective stock had plummeted so precipitously. “Oh,not us, sir. Though Mr. Faulks’s enterprise is the subject of some concern, we remain at the zenith of popularity. No, each of the passages I quoted was a commentary on the prospects of book publishing in general.”