[John Whitworth]

I can't remember this one before, but obviously some can.

No. 2805: cringeworthy


It’s time for toe-curlingly bad analogies again (up to eight each). Here are a couple of corkers to inspire you, courtesy of Bill Greenwell and George Simmers, from the last time we set this challenge: ‘She spoke as throatily as if a frog and its family had got into her throat and smoked a few packets of Peter Stuyvesant before growing claws and scratching at the inside of her thorax’ (BG); ‘Her manner became so suddenly grim it was as though she had injected all of Aberdeen directly into a vein’ (GS). Please email entries, wherever possible, to lucy@spectator.co.uk by midday on 3 July.