[Ann Drysdale]

Charlie, I think you and I are going head-to-head on this one. (or do I mean ass to arse?)

First time in the Country

First time I stayed with Gran in Steeple Bumpstead
she introduced me to her outdoor privy.
Here was the antidote to playground toilets.
Low porcelain, long chains, Now Wash Your Hands
and cold, unyielding tracing-paper wipes
gave place to a rickety bucket with a lid
in a tin shed at the top of a cottage garden,
newspaper squares threaded on hairy string.

My urgent expedition that first morning
was a damp-slippered trek through dewy daisies
to sit enthroned in solitary splendour,
the door propped open with a mossy brick,
seeing the sun poke slowly through a reedbed
to fondle the ginger cat under the asters;
hearing the hot trickle rumble into the bucket
to an improvised accompaniment of larks.

[Erik Olson]

__mistaken post___

[Charlie Southerland]

Well Annie, yours is more elegant for sure. My grandmother elegantly milked the cows while I watched her. She could spray the cats from at least ten feet away and never miss a stroke.

[Ann Drysdale]

Later in life I learned to do that cat-thing with both cow and goats. Thinking about it, the sound of milk-bucket and privy-bucket were very similar.

[Charlie Southerland]

Not being very familiar with these comps and the judges, is "shit" appropriate or do they look down(no pun intended) on it and prefer "shite."
I would rather use the former than the latter for the alliteration of those 2 last lines.