[Hilary Biehl]

A different title might help. I like James' suggestion.

[Julie Steiner]

The title "Nobody" might be a nice nod to one of her most famous poems.

[W T Clark]

David: Dickinson doesn't deserve conceit, she deserves reality.

[Julie Steiner]

I take the poem to be about the inadequacy of the narrator's value system, and not about Emily Dickinson at all.

I'm reminded of the Army engineer Joseph C. Ives' infamous assessment of the Grand Canyon, when he was the head of the first U.S. surveying party to it (1856-1860): "This region can be approached only from the south, and after entering it there is nothing to do but to leave. Ours has been the first, and will doubtless be the last party of whites to visit this profitless locality."

[Phil Wood]

 

Originally Posted by David Callin

Anonymous Emily

born in Amherst
christened in Amherst
never married in Amherst
blossomed in Amherst
faded in Amherst
died in Amherst
buried in Amherst
and that was the end of

Just a thought.

[Mark McDonnell]

I like it. The use of the Solomon Grundy structure, that thumping finality, signals the irony pretty clearly for me. I'm surprised nobody's picked up on the nursery rhyme. I didn't necessarily read it as against metropolitanism, more just the idea that one can stay in one place (wherever that might be) and have the most extraordinary inner life. I think of Blake, too, who barely ever left Lambeth.

Mark

[Jim Ramsey]

Hi David,

I like the idea of taking a line from one of her poems as a title. James's idea of "Read it Slant," a play on the famous line "tell all the truth but tell it slant" was good. I like Julie's idea of using "Nobody" too. I think there are several titles that could be taken from "I'm Nobody! Who are you?":

I'm Nobody! Who are you?
Are you - Nobody - too?
Then there's a pair of us!
Dont tell! they'd banish us - you know!

How dreary - to be - Somebody!
How public - like a Frog -
To tell your name - the livelong June -
To an admiring Bog!

BTW, I got your poem all along from the first. I was only pretending to be oblivious—not!

Jim

[Roger Slater]

I like "Nobody" as the title, since Emily's poem has the same irony as your poem to today's reader, i.e., she's far from a nobody.

But I don't think the title has to be an allusion to her work. How about something like "Easy Come, Easy Go"?

The one line that bothers me ever so slightly is "Never married in Amherst," which sort of sounds like it's suggesting she might have married elsewhere but not in Amherst. Also, it seems to imply that not getting married is a form of isolation and obscurity, which is questionable. You could omit that line?

[Hilary Biehl]

Agree that "Nobody" would also be a good title.

[David Callin]

Originally Posted by Mark McDonnell

I like it. The use of the Solomon Grundy structure, that thumping finality, signals the irony pretty clearly for me. I'm surprised nobody's picked up on the nursery rhyme. I didn't necessarily read it as against metropolitanism, more just the idea that one can stay in one place (wherever that might be) and have the most extraordinary inner life. I think of Blake, too, who barely ever left Lambeth.

That's just about it, Mark. You put it better than I did. And it is, of course, Solomon Grundy, through and through. I was going to say that, but wasn't sure whether I needed to.

And also this from Julie - "I take the poem to be about the inadequacy of the narrator's value system, and not about Emily Dickinson at all."

Anyway, this squib has received more attention than I expected, so thanks, all, for that.

I really don't think you're spectacularly dense, Hilary. The leap required from the reader may be greater than it should be. I think Jim R might agree with that, as would Trevor and Cameron.

Pretty much all of the titles suggested - "Julie's "Failure", James's "Read It Slant" (a particularly good one), Julie's "Nobody" (also a good one) - would help.

And I did wonder about the dashes, Rogerbob, but couldn't find a good way to insert them into the poem. And I will have to think about the "never married" line.

Cheers all

David