[FOsen]

It’s not the way it complements my guy-pad,
nor how it apprehends my least request,
that drove me to desert you for my Ipad.
It’s not the pleasing shape that I find best,
nor even how it lights up at my touch
and never tries to gainsay me or judge.
Although I like those features very much,
there's someone else’s face I’d rather smudge.

I love you, as I have from the beginning,
but I can’t take this any more. Please note,
I really feel more sinned against than sinning,
for to ensure you’d see these words I wrote—
let alone they’d pique your interest—
I’ve had to post this up on Pinterest.

Frank

[Pedro Poitevin]

No matter what you say you see
on Buyer's Choice, the TV show,
I'd rather have an iPad 3.

We'll just agree to disagree.
You'll be one angry bird––I know––
no matter what. You say you see

no point in contradicting me,
so let's try softening the blow:
I'd rather have an iPad 3,

but I met someone––this is key––
who's going to give it to me. Whoa,
no matter what, you say? You see,

the way to get full warranty
is signing on the line below
"I'd rather have an iPad 3."

The fine print says I'll get it free
unless you stay. I'll let you go
no matter what you say. You see,
I'd rather have an iPad 3.

Pedro.