[basil ransome-davies]

Not to mention the general atmosphere of paranoia involved in air travel.

[Don Jones]

********************************

[John Whitworth]

So, Don, going up you would be burned to death, but going down you would simply be smashed to smithereens. Shelley Berman, years ago, said it al. Which won't prevent me saying it again.

I take it, Don, you have never flown by Ryanair. No, I thought not. Ryan (the living proof that not all Irishmen are charming) is thinking of ripping out the seats and making us stand for short haul flights.

[David Anthony]

Rep’s Rondeaubout

Traffic jams are so much fun—
better far than boring meetings.
Get the week’s expense claim done!
Phone a friend with cheery greetings!
Never worry when you’re late—
fast lane life won’t take you far.
Some things are in league with fate—
traffic jams are.

[Jayne Osborn]

John,
You're not confusing Michael Ryan, the Hungerford massacre monster, with Michael O'Leary, Ryanair boss, are you?

It was O'Leary who once summed up the 'no frills' airline (which, incidentally, in terms of profit and passenger air miles, is now the biggest in the world) in his own broad Irish, inimitable way: "It's just a fucking taxi!"
Even so, I've never had to stand up in a taxi.

[Don Jones]

**********************

[John Whitworth]

Yes, Jayne, it's O'Leary I mean. It was the name Ryanair that threw me. No, Don, I've never flown in the fellow's planes. I go by the fat Greek, though actually Stelios is a Cypriot and anyway he doesn't own the airline any more. That's Easyjet, known by the passengers as Squeezyjet. It's lucky I have short legs. The BEST airline I ever went by was an American job that took me to Texas. Great people. The pilot looked just like Wild Bill Hickock.

[basil ransome-davies]

These days I find actually flying is the least of it. I seem to have the kind of face that attracts suspicion from the steroid-abusing bouncers, groping perverts & toxic little Hitlers who constitute airport security. I've not had my prostate felt by them yet, but feeling that it's only a matter of time I've virtually discontinued air travel. Fortunately I only visit western Europe these days, so it's no big sacrifice.

[Ann Drysdale]

I have only flown two or three times. For work, and with someone else paying. I was once sent on a bucketshop flight to teach in foreign parts and was terrified. It didn't help that I was flying to Crete, location of the first-ever air disaster. I decided, high above the ruins of Knossos, that I'm not in the least afraid of flying. I'm afraid of falling.

[Stephenie McKinnon]

Thank you all, especially Don and Jayne, for easing my fears of flying. I'd stand at the Security check point pulling out hundreds of hair clips if it meant never having to set foot on the plane.

I'm with Ann. It's neither the crash landing, nor the burning I fear. It's the 5-minute, anticipatory, nausea-inducing fall from the sky which sounds hideous to me. If I'm going to be exploded into a million burning pieces, I'd rather not have time to think about it right before it happens. I guess that means my vote is for the take-off crash.