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Unread 02-17-2011, 11:28 AM
John Whitworth's Avatar
John Whitworth John Whitworth is offline
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Nice one, Roger. Very nice one.

In what way, Max?

Here are my first thoughts. I'm already having second.


Robert Frost

Whose words these are I think I know.
It’s what’s-his-name, the so-and-so.
You must remember who I mean,
The fellow in the magazine.
Last week – the stuff I read you out.
What was it he was on about?
In fact it was the other night
I swore that he was bloody right.
You can’t remember? That’s because
Your brain-power isn’t what it was.
But I’m still razor-sharp. I never
Fail. You can’t beat being clever.
Do you know I’m putting up for MENSA?
But you’re considerably denser.
Yeah! What’s-his-name. Although perhaps
It could have been two other chaps.
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Unread 02-17-2011, 12:04 PM
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basil ransome-davies basil ransome-davies is offline
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This comp is stimulating some zesty wit
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Unread 02-17-2011, 12:45 PM
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John Whitworth John Whitworth is offline
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Here's more. We await your entrance, Bazza. It's getting the LINE that's so hard.


My Soul is an Enchanted Goat

My soul is an enchanted goat
So winsome and so weird.
He has a splendid shaggy coat
And sports a little beard.

My heart is a triceratops.
She’s so my honeybunch,
Stravaiging round bone china shops
Completely out to lunch.

My spirit is a bath of gin
That wafts in ghostly guise
Reporting on the state I’m in,
With judgements apt and wise.

My body is a house of lard:
I get my daily dose
Frying black puddings by the yard
And duck eggs by the gross.
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Unread 02-17-2011, 12:59 PM
Roger Slater Roger Slater is offline
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Speaking of zest . . .

(To His Coy Mistress)

...Had we but world enough, and lime,
This tonic, Lady, were no crime.
We would sit down and pour our gin
And squeeze the lime and tonic in.
Thou by the barstool wouldst propound
Round after round after limey round,
And I would not one round refuse
Till the conversion of the Jews,
For, Lady, you deserve this state,
Nor would I drink at lower rate.
...And yet it's almost closing time.
The barkeep says they're out of lime,
And now he's crying out, Last call!
Let's go to my place, drink and ball.
If you like lime so much, let's run.
Inside my fridge I'm sure there's one.
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Unread 02-17-2011, 01:08 PM
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Gail White Gail White is offline
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Gad, the standard is high! All of these are outstanding.
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Unread 02-17-2011, 01:27 PM
Max Goodman Max Goodman is offline
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You're right, John. I was being dense. The instructions could mean to keep changing a letter in each line, but that wouldn't be practical at all.

You're right, too, Bazza and Gail. These are good!
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Unread 02-17-2011, 02:08 PM
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John Whitworth John Whitworth is offline
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Come on, Roger. We can do this for ever. We don't need anyone else. World enough and lime!
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