[Douglas G. Brown]

Well, if this is where we're headed, here's a True Crime story of a notorious cannibalistic serial killer, boiled down to a grisly little sonnet.

How Jeffrey Dahmer loved those gay young men;
Male whores recruited from Milwaukee dives.
He’d bring them to his kitchen now and then
For escapades; the last ones of their lives.
With hands around the neck, he’d strangulate
( A drunken spree with Jeff was never dull )
Each youthful gay male hooker “dinner date”;
And later, Jeff would venerate his skull.

His permutation of the Atkins Diet
Was quite perverse, it cannot be denied;
An appetite that Jeffrey kept so quiet,
For human morsels, barbecued or fried.
One observation’s certain, you can bet;
Jeff Dahmer was exactly what he et.

[John Whitworth]

Oh splendid stuff, Dougie. What do you suppose she DOES want?

And thank you, Janice. I value your opinion more highly that that of the divine Lucy. Pity you don't run the show.

[Adrian Fry]

Personally, I hope civilization has not degenerated to a level at which only murder, rape and child abuse are considered 'serious'. I find the word is often used in an attempt to have one concentrate on a dull subject - on starting work, I was given 'a serious talk about pensions', for instance.

[John Whitworth]

The serious talk my father balked at, and so did I, come to that, was the one about the birds and the bees. What was it those birds and bees did. Whatever it was, it was serious. Do you know a light-hearted look beckons?

[Brian Allgar]

Removed because it gave offense in some quarters, and because I'd forgotten that this is an open site that can be accessed by anyone.

[John Whitworth]

Yup! I am to blame. Good though I doubt the pure Lucy (a Girton girl surely) will come across for it. Meanwhile I've done the birds and the bees.
What is it that bees do, by the way?


A Serious Talk

The birds and the bees are
A serious matter
So every old geezer
Should practise the chat to
His chillun: the reason
For buzzing and cooing;
The birds and the bees and
The stuff they are doing.
Don't like it, don't do it,
This horrible badness.
You're certain to rue it.
The end will be madness.
So clean up your habits
Before it's too late and
The morals of rabbits
Consign you to Satan.

[Brian Allgar]

Originally Posted by John Whitworth

What is it that bees do, by the way?

Well, as I understand it, they shove this thingy between the petals ...

[John Whitworth]

I say, how rude. In public too!

[Brian Allgar]

Removed because it gave offense in some quarters, and because I'd forgotten that this is an open site that can be accessed by anyone.

[Janice D. Soderling]

Don't blame me, blame the influence of the dog star. Every year in late July and August, the Sphere is riot with all kinds of naughty writing. You have even got Tim doing it now in a thread of his own.

May we never hold the Sonnet bake-off this time of year. I shudder to think what the judges would be faced with.

Maybe Sirus is the reason behind Anthony Weiner's out-of-control behavior; he is, perhaps, simply more sensitive to the influence of the stars than other politicians.

Also we have just had July's supermoon a few days ago and the effects might not have worn off yet.