[Nigel Mace]

Moved by the mighty name of Haldane, I suddenly saw this could go in very different directions, so.....

LIGHT-HEADED LUNCH

“They want to leave Europe! - a concept unsound
as draining the Channel, or renting the pound
to shore up their mortgage, or getting around
to harvesting poppies on Lord's cricket ground
and then undercutting the drugs that they’ve found
now fund Al-Qaeda! That’s what they expound!”

His Lordship was snorting – not that way, of course –
while clubmen, post lunch, came to hear his discourse
on blue water loonies who’d borrow a horse
from tabloidy totties who showed scant remorse
for hacking the mobiles of victims of force
to please a Yank/Aussie. “And now it’s divorce,”
continued His Lordship, “and rumours abound.
They’ll yet sell our birthrights… for shares in the Bourse!”

“It may not seem likely, but often I’ve found
you can’t rule it out... while this lot’s around.”