If a girl asked you back for your dinner, then you
had to be very wary of what might ensue.
For you were in trouble, without any doubt,
if, after the dinner, the fruitcake came out.
The cake was a sign that her mother approved.
Its absence denoted that she was unmoved.
Sometimes the wee lassie would sit there and pout
if, after the dinner, no fruitcake came out.
“Did you get fruitcake?” we’d ask of the poor
unfortunate wretch as he stepped out the door.
And if he confirmed it, we’d holler and shout
that the ring must be next, if the cake had come out.
We were just lads acting big about town,
enjoying our lives before settling down.
There was many a choirboy behaved like a lout,
afraid that the fruitcake would later come out.
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