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Unread 09-30-2015, 11:56 PM
Martin Rocek's Avatar
Martin Rocek Martin Rocek is offline
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Default Bake-Off #3 secondary challenge.

The third of our three 2015 Translation Bake-off secondary events may be impossible. This song is filled with cooking-related idioms which, on their non-literal level, don't have anything to do with cooking. Good luck! You'll need it!

You may post as many different attempts at translating this song to this thread as you please, and you may continue to edit them until the thread is locked at noon (Pacific Daylight Time) on Tuesday, October 13.

You may adjust the syllable count so long as the translation is still singable to the same tune. Providing an audio link of yourself or someone else singing your translation, to show how you envision this, would be helpful (and entertaining). Entries with audio links will be rewarded with an extra point in the voting, equivalent to one vote.

Full contest details here:
http://www.ablemuse.com/erato/showthread.php?t=25208

The online French-English dictionary (actually two) accessible at WordReference.com may be helpful, here:
http://www.wordreference.com


SONG TITLE, COMPOSER, LYRICIST, PERFORMANCE VIDEO:

The title of the song is "Mon loup" ("My Wolf"). The final "p" is silent.

The singer-songwriter is Laura Cahen.

The first video link presents many of the French idioms in a hyper-literal way:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAs3z_6Edpg
The "FAIM" ("HUNGER") at the end of the video is a pun on "FIN" ("END").

The second video link presents the song more simply, in a live, acoustic performance which some people may prefer:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2HxzzgIaRI


ORIGINAL TEXT, showing the form.

You will probably need to let go of the A rhymes in your translation. The meter is so loose that it doesn't make much sense to count syllables at all.

Je veux te manger, mon loup ..................... A
Te passer à la casserole ............................. B
Je vais prendre tes jambes à mon cou ....... A
Te cuisiner me rend folle ............................. B

Je veux te mariner, mon loup ...................... A
Te griller les moustaches à la poêle ............ C
Je vais te faire revenir à feu doux ................ A
Crois-moi, cette recette est au poil .............. C

(Refrain)
Ah hou...hou hou hou hou hou hou ............. A
Sweet sweet honey, I love you .................... A

Je veux te déguster, mon loup .................... A
T'assaisonner avec magie .......................... D
Je vais prendre le temps de te rendre fou .. A
Te ferai mijoter au bain-marie .................... D

Je veux te découper, mon loup ................... A
T'éplucher comme une orange ................... E
Tu ne feras plus de zeste du tout ............... A
Et je n'aurai plus faim, c'est étrange ........... E

(Refrain)

Ton poivre et sel se mélange ...................... E
Come sucré salé, à mes cheveux d'ange ... E

Je veux te gaver, mon loup ......................... A
Que je te reste en travers ........................... F
J'y mettrai tous les ingrédients, mon chou .. A
Et tu remettras le couvert ............................ F

Tu veux me gácher, mon loup ..................... A
Me rouler dans la farine .............................. G
Tu t'imagines que cela a du goût ................ A
Je t'en ferai des tartines .............................. G

(Refrain)


LITERAL/FIGURATIVE ENGLISH PROSE CRIB:

Je veux te manger, mon loup
(Lit) I want thee to eat, my wolf.
(Fig) I want to devour you, my wolf; Not necessarily a reference to oral sex, but perhaps suggestive of sexual consummation/consumption in general. Alternatively, "I want to bite your head off" or "I want to chew you out," in the sense of yelling at someone for a transgression.

Te passer à la casserole
(Lit) (I want) thee to put in the saucepan...(I want) to put you in the saucepan.
(Fig) I want to have my wicked way with you. "Passer à la casserole" is to be subjected to sexual relations, be forced to put out sexual favors; it is also used more generally for "to go through hell," so here it might be translated more innocently as "To put you through hell."

Je vais prendre tes jambes à mon cou
(Lit) I am going to take thy legs to my neck (vais= am going, prendre = to take)
(Fig) When someone is said to take his legs to his neck--Prendre les jambes à son cou--he is running very fast. Here, the expression has the pronouns changed for double entendre's sake; or it could simply suggest an uncomfortable posture, as for torture.

Te cuisiner me rend folle
(Lit) Thee to cook, me renders crazy.
(Fig) (The thought of) cooking you is driving me crazy. Or, I'm crazy about (the thought of) giving you a grilling, giving you the third degree, interrogating you.

Je veux te mariner, mon loup
(Lit) I want thee to marinate/soak, my wolf.
(Fig) I want to leave you to stew in your own juices, my wolf.

Te griller les moustaches à la poêle
(Lit) Thee to broil/barbecue/grill the whiskers at the wood-burning stove. "Poêle" can also mean frying-pan, but that seems unlikely here.
(Fig) To singe your whiskers at the wood-burning stove; The heat source might be taken as a metaphor for female anatomy, but it is more likely to refer to torture.

Je vais te faire revenir à feu doux
(Lit) I am going thee to make return to fire (that is) gentle.
(Fig) I am going to bring you back to low heat, put you on the back burner, keep you on a slow simmer even when the main cooking is over.

Crois-moi, cette recette est au poil
(Lit) Believe me, this recipe is with pelt.
(Fig) "Au poil" is slang for "great, perfect." It also means "stark naked," or, in cooking, "with the skin left on."

(Refrain)
Ah hou...hou hou hou hou hou hou
Sweet sweet honey, I love you

Je veux te déguster, mon loup
(Lit) I want thee to taste/savor/enjoy, my wolf.
(Fig) I want to taste/savor/enjoy you, my wolf.

T'assaisonner avec magie
(Lit) Thee to season with magic.
(Fig) To spice you up with fascination/charm; also, to tell you off via fascination/charm.

Je vais prendre le temps de te rendre fou
(Lit) I'm going to take the time for to thee render crazy.
(Fig) I'm going to take the time to drive you crazy. There may also be a hint of taking the time to render the fat from a cooked chicken or similar, although the French verb "rendre" doesn't seem to be used this way.

Te ferai mijoter au bain-marie
(Lit) Thee (I) will make simmer/stew in the bain-marie/double boiler/hot-water bath (cooking paraphernalia).
(Fig) I will leave you to stew in your own juices.

Je veux te découper, mon loup
(Lit) I want thee to cut/slice/chop, my wolf.
(Fig) I want to chop you into bits, my wolf.

T'éplucher comme une orange
(Lit) Thee to peel like an orange.
(Fig) To peel you like an orange.

Tu ne feras plus de zeste du tout
(Lit) You won't make more of zest at all.
(Fig) You won't have any skin left at all. There seems to be a hint of the English sense of "zest" here, too, meaning "enthusiasm, spirit, drive, energy," although the same connotation doesn't seem to exist in French (yet.)

Et je n'aurai plus faim, c'est étrange
(Lit) And I won't have more hunger, it's strange.
(Fig) And I won't be hungry anymore, how strange...And I'll have lost my appetite, how odd.

(Refrain)

Ton poivre et sel se mélange
(Lit) Thy pepper and salt get mixed
(Fig) Your salt-and-pepper (graying hair) gets mixed

Comme sucré-salé, à mes cheveux d'ange
(Lit) Like sweet-and-sour (sweet and savory), with my hairs of angel.
(Fig) Like sweet-and-sour, with my angel hair (the narrator's hair, or a reference to capellini, a very thin kind of pasta).

Je veux te gaver, mon loup
(Lit) I want thee to stuff/force-feed (like a goose raised for pâté), my wolf.
(Fig) I want to force you to swallow things you'd rather avoid, my wolf.

Que je te reste en travers
(Lit) (I want) that I (to) thee remain sideways.
(Fig) (I want) that I get stuck in your throat, that I stick in your craw, that I continue to bother you and you can't get rid of me.

J'y mettrai tous les ingrédients, mon chou
(Lit) I there will put all the ingredients, my cabbage.
(Fig) I will get ready, my sweet; "Chou" literally means cabbage, but it is also a type of small, round French pastry, and is a traditional term of endearment for children and lovers. It may also be a shortened version of the word "chouette," which literally means "owl" but sounds a bit like the English word "sweet," and thus has a slang meaning of "sweet, neat, awesome."

Et tu remettras le couvert
(Lit) And thou wilt again set the cutlery/silverware.
(Fig) And you will face me again. Le couvert is cutlery/silverware/a place setting; "mettre le couvert" is to set or lay the table; but "remettre le couvert" is to do something again, or for two people to face each other again.

Tu veux me gâcher, mon loup
(Lit) Thou want me to waste, my wolf.
(Fig) You want to mess me up, my wolf.

Me rouler dans la farine
(Lit) Me to roll in the flour.
(Fig) To lie to me...to fool me..to totally rip me off...to take me to the cleaners.

Tu t'imagines que cela a du goût
(Lit) Thou (to) thyself imaginest that that has some flavor.
(Fig) You think to yourself that that's tasty.

Je t'en ferai des tartines
(Lit) I thee of it will make some bread-slices (en = "of it).
(Fig) I'll make all this a big deal to you; "Faire une tartine" of something is to exaggerate it, make a big production of it; when trying to convince someone of something or express a grievance, "to spread it on thick" (like butter on a piece of bread or toast); "Tartiner" is also to churn out a lot of something.

(Refrain)
  #2  
Unread 10-04-2015, 08:02 AM
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Claudia Gary Claudia Gary is offline
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This is hilarious, Martin, especially with the videos.
But you're right that it may be untranslatable -- or at least extremely difficult.

It's not enough that this feast (?) of culinary metaphors (or metaphoric cliches) only works well in French. What's more, the title -- and maybe even the overriding idea for the song -- appears to be based on a sly play on the words of another French culinary expression: "J'ai une faim de loup." Literally, that means "I have the hunger of a wolf," but here, "of" may have been shifted to "for" (which -- though I'm not sure -- may not require a change of words in French).

Unfortunately, the default English translation of THAT particular phrase seems to be: "I could eat a horse."

Oh, dear.
  #3  
Unread 10-04-2015, 09:56 AM
Mary McLean Mary McLean is offline
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Well, here goes. There was no way wolf was going to work with rhymes, so I tried a different animal.

My Bear

I would like to eat you, bear.
I want to swallow you whole.
I’m crazy hungry now, I swear,
to cook up a bear casserole.

First I’ll marinate you, bear,
whiskers singeing over my stove.
I’ll keep you simmering gently, with some care.
This recipe’s a treasure trove.

(Refrain)
Ah hou...hou hou hou hou hou hou
Sweet sweet honey, my bear, I love you.
Ah hou...hou hou hou hou hou hou
Sweet sweet honey, I love you.

I will savour you, my bear,
seasoned with bouquet garni.
I will stir your senses to despair
and melt you in my bain-marie.

I will chop you to bits, my bear,
strip you like orange peel.
That zesty skin you’ll no longer wear,
and no more hunger will I feel.

(Refrain)

Your salt and pepper mingle there
like sweet and sour with my angel-hair.

I will overstuff you, bear.
I want to get stuck in your crop.
Reset the table and whip out your pair... of chairs.
I’ll lay the fixings out on top.

You would like to dine elsewhere,
butter both sides of your bread?
Treat me like an hors d’oeuvre if you dare:
I’ll make you wish you were dead.

(Refrain)

Added in: audio link! And edited text above to match final version as discussed in post 6. I think you'll get an error when you click on the link, but if you click the download button for this file (Voice 003.m4a) and save it to disk it should play.
https://www.dropbox.com/s/g3dfufjh20...20003.m4a?dl=0

Last edited by Mary McLean; 10-10-2015 at 07:20 AM. Reason: added audio link
  #4  
Unread 10-04-2015, 12:30 PM
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Claudia Gary Claudia Gary is offline
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Mary, that's superb! And I think the reference to hors d'oeuvres deserves extra credit.

My only quibble is with the penultimate line of the penultimate stanza. It might work better metrically (and avoid an internal rhyme) if you say "pull up two chairs."

Claudia
  #5  
Unread 10-04-2015, 01:32 PM
Susan McLean Susan McLean is offline
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Your version is fun, Mary!

Susan
  #6  
Unread 10-04-2015, 02:00 PM
Mary McLean Mary McLean is offline
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Thanks, Susan and Claudia! Yes, that line is tricky. The sung version has quite a pause before 'mon Chou,' so I'm not sure I like breaking after a preposition like that, but it's worth considering. (It would also let me switch to a singular chair, which is a better rhyme).

Edited to add: the other thing I was considering with that line is to use the pause for more of a double entendre:
Reset the table and whip out your pair....of chairs

Last edited by Mary McLean; 10-04-2015 at 05:09 PM.
  #7  
Unread 10-05-2015, 12:00 AM
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Martin Rocek Martin Rocek is offline
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Mary, this is great!

Claudia,
I would like to clarify that Challenges 1&3 are not my doing--I just posted them for someone who didn't quite have the time to run the whole show.

Martin
  #8  
Unread 10-05-2015, 03:52 AM
Kyle Norwood Kyle Norwood is offline
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A loose translation, true to the spirit of the song, I hope . . .

My Wolf

Wolf, I want to eat you up,
you’re the dish I’m crazy for,
I’ll wrap your legs around my neck,
I’ll push you through my oven door.

Wolf, I want to marinate you,
My heat will curl your moustache hair,
I’ll slowly cook you in your skin,
And you’ll be glad you left your lair,

Ah oo . . . oo oo oo oo oo oo,
Sweet sweet wolfie, I love you.

Wolf, I long to taste and enjoy you,
spice you with my magic charm,
take my time to drive you crazy,
heat you up and do you harm.

Wolf, I want to cut you up,
Peel you like a juicy lime,
You’ll have nothing left to give,
And I’ll be happy all the time,

Ah oo . . . oo oo oo oo oo oo,
Sweet sweet wolfie, I love you.

Mix your salt and pepper with my sweet and sour,
You’ll be glad you’re in my power.

I will stuff you like a goose,
I’ll ride you in my riding hood,
Dinner’s done, my sweetie pie,
Better set the table ‘cause we taste so good.

Wolf, you want to mess me up,
Powder me and put me to bed,
You think I’ll be a tasty treat,
But I’ll wolf you down like buttered bread.

Ah oo . . . oo oo oo oo oo oo,
Sweet sweet wolfie, I love you.
  #9  
Unread 10-05-2015, 05:38 AM
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Catherine Chandler Catherine Chandler is offline
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... and don't forget "chou" is both a term of endearment and also "cabbage".
  #10  
Unread 10-05-2015, 07:37 AM
Mary McLean Mary McLean is offline
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Kyle, I like it. The last stanza in particular works better than I thought such a literal translation would. There's a lot my version misses out on by losing the wolf (not least the howl of the refrain).
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