[Roger Slater]

I also like the falling tone of the last line. My problem at first was that the antics of the grown-ups didn't seem repugnant enough to make a little boy not want to grow up. Only when I recalled the "I won't grow up" theme of Peter Pan did the idea gain sufficient force since it resonated with Barrie.

[Simon Hunt]

This one is a pleasure to read and resonates nicely with both Peter Pan, of course, and Barrie's own life. I too wondered if "good" weren't a little flat at the end (and thought of suggesting "appeals," which would sacrifice the alliterative g sounds...). I understand what some mean about the effective falling tone. Is it a small logical flaw that the statue should seem to be aware of what's happening some distance away at the castle? If so, I suppose it's a smaller leap than his being sentient at all...

[Martin Rocek]

I don't have anything to add to what has been said by others, so I'm only registering my enjoyment. Thanks to the author.

[Mary Meriam]

This is delicious. My guess is Ann Drysdale. I love the louts/out/shouting in the first two lines; also "clutch their champers," "shoving sideshow," "plays a pipe," and this line:
Surrounded by the seething, soused, and boring,

These lines are perfectly "boyish" and seem to capture Peter Pan's voice:

he faces the green hills and wonders why
growing up seems good to anyone.

[Orwn Acra]

Originally Posted by Charlie Southerland

I liked the poem. It sounds so Whitworthian.

Probably not Whitworth as there are no initial caps. I like the poem as much as if it were a Whitworth, though. If I may nitpick, the statue may be bronze in material but is actually covered in the green patina more frequently seen on copper; it matters because small bronze boy suggests a different, non-green color -- and this matters because Peter Pan is always seen in green, yet the green patina occurs only on older objects, so the irony is lost if the reader is not imagining green.

[Michael Cantor]

Well done, and the portrait of the concertgoers in L7/L8 is particularly good, as is the close. Handles the form well. Little to crit. This is my favorite by far of the first four.

[Gail White]

A particularly brilliant sestet. I had previously known Kirriemuir only as the setting of a famous bawdy ballad.

[Kyle Norwood]

This is deftly done. My only complaint is that the contrast between the "seething, soused, and boring" adults and the boy who won't grow up seems a bit predictable.

[Robin Helweg-Larsen]

I like this very much. The picture is extensive, meditative and well-completed.

My only two issues are that for me 'Glamis' doesn't rhyme with 'proms' (I don't pronounce 'o's in the way Americans do) in an overly similar set of rhymes; and that reading the last line is uncomfortable because of the missing syllable.

[Woody Long]

Re the pronunciation of Glamis, listen here.

— Woody