[F.F. Teague]

Thanks, Martin; I'm glad you like it. No, I suppose it isn't exactly about planets. Sorry; I just keep running out of time at the mo.

Thanks for your contributions to the thread, both great. I like the opening of 'Sol Concealed' with the Sun's whining and the dynamic description of the eclipse. The birds certainly took a power nap at Dartington and I love 'dog-day afternoons'. The scene setting is great too; I wrote a prose piece about the Dartington eclipse to try to get to the essence of the experience, but it's possible I missed out a few interesting things in the process. The end of your poem is strong too. Re. being PC about the pronouns, I'm not sure what to suggest, really. I don't mind Sun as male and Moon as female, but some might, I suppose, not least persons identifying as 'they'. It's tricky, these days.

'The Stargazer's Dog' is excellent. I like the 'astronomical' / 'gastronomical' rhyme; and also 'celestial' and 'digestial', lol. The pup of the poem is so sweet. I like 'tree' as a verb and the Swiss cheese. I'm sure he would miss you and return, and I like the shouting and screaming. Martin, has this been published anywhere? It's very good :-)

Now we have pleasure in posting another Morris piece, a song in which the Sun is mentioned along with various trees. The main theme is a little irrelevant to the thread, but I'll set out the top line of the tune underneath as a sort of bonus feature. Each dot represents a beat and the chorus is my exact rendition of the song of a pigeon in the garden at the time of writing (2015). Funnily enough, there's a pigeon singing right now :>)


Opus pigeon

Sing pigeons sing as the Sun starts to rise . .
perching in Father Lime close to the skies . .
watching the world wake with golden-rimmed eyes . .
sing pigeons sing thy sweet tune . . . . .

oo . . oo . . oo-oo . . . oo
oo . . oo . . oo-oo . . . oo
oo . . oo . . oo-oo . . . .
oo

Sing pigeons sing as the Sun courses high . .
rounding Far Oak and her limbs swept awry . .
sailing on silver wings shimmering by . .
sing pigeons sing thy sweet tune . . . . .

oo . . oo . . oo-oo . . . oo
oo . . oo . . oo-oo . . . oo
oo . . oo . . oo-oo . . . .
oo

Sing pigeons sing as the Sun sets to night . .
roosting in Horse Chestnut bathed in rose light . .
settling by candle bronze soon to bloom white . .
sing pigeons sing thy sweet tune . . . . .

oo . . oo . . oo-oo . . . oo
oo . . oo . . oo-oo . . . oo
oo . . oo . . oo-oo . . . .
oo

---
Tune, C Major (bold for below middle C)

C D E G E D C A G C
D D E F E D E E F G
G C' B A G F G F E D
C D E C A G C

Voices, piano, tambourine, maybe.

(If this isn't clear, I'll see if I can put it on Flat and take a screenshot.)

🌞🌞🌞