[Jim Moonan]

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Hi James, and welcome! This was/is a pleasure to read —What an energized, imaginative romp through the rat kingdom(?) or its metaphorical equivalent. You weave images with sonics beautifully and your word selection and phrasing is distinct.

My only problem is with my inability to feel confident I know what is happening in this. It feels metaphorical but I can’t make the connection. My problem, not yours! It good to see a word like “burgeon” appear. It’s a hard word to apply to anything I can think of, but you found a way. I also liked this:

their feet which had been almost human
interlinked like verses

Matt also points out other arresting images that make this feel elevated to be a vision.

I like the flurry of hyphenations at the end.

Maybe as others take a shot at what is happening in the poem I’ll come back and finish this crit, but my first impression is that it is packed full with good poetry.

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Coming back in to say I overlooked the "Amen" that ends the Poem. Interesting name choice, Amen.There is a Joycean stream of language that ends the poem

L25: stumbled on the phrase "the one led away". Is it another way of saying "the one takeaway"?

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