[Marion Shore]

Woo, Lance! Gross! Funny! Romantic, in it's way.

[Jayne Osborn]

Hey Lance, I'd like to say "Nice one" but...yuk!

A few typos:

There was a moment of bestial tugging and rhythmic heaving when an elderly nurse
rather than
There was moment of bestial tugging and rhythmic heaving when a elderly nurse

and both surgeon's masks should be 'both surgeons' masks'

Jayne

[Lance Levens]

Basil and Jayne,

Thanks for commenting. Sometimes I just feel like writing a good bodice ripper.

Jayne,

Thanks, much. I caught them as I sent off the email. You are so diligent!

Lance

[Jayne Osborn]

My pleasure, Lance. I do try to be diligent but some days I'm just delinquent!

Jayne

[Jayne Osborn]

“Oh, yes… that’s lovely! Mmm… Don’t stop!” I’d never felt anything like this before. “Wow!”

She did stop at that point, but I didn’t mind; I was curious to see what had just had me in raptures.

“What is it, exactly?” I asked.

“It’s a Stress Relief Head Massager,” she replied, holding up a contraption that resembled a huge, ten-legged spider with a wooden knob on top of it – or, to be less dramatic, an open-ended balloon whisk with little blobs on.

How could this thing cause such delight? She continued to gently apply the bendy wire gadget, as it probed this way and that across my scalp.

“Ugh, Mum, you’ve got head lice! You’ve been at the Junior School reading to those kids again, haven’t you? I was going to ask you to use the massager on me, but not now. Yuk - it is not all pleasure, this exploration.”

[Marion Shore]

Jayne, I didn't know if it was possible to outgross Lance's story, but you may have done it! Uggghhhh!

[Jayne Osborn]

Haha, thanks, Marion. (I thought it was relatively tame compared with Lance's!)

I don't think this one can be done without a certain gross grossness coming into it!

Jayne